Well, today I am on track! Finally!! Had a shocking migraine over the weekend....one of those ones where I just slept the whole time because it hurt too much to keep the eyes open. Yesterday was ok, and I did heaps of washng and housework to try to get it under control. Today, I have hit the floor running.
I stopped smoking at 10.08pm last night, so thats 14 hours ago. It made sense to give up on MJs birthday. I did that 5 years ago, and didnt start again until my dad was real sick...I had my quit going for 2 years 10 months and was so pissed off with myself when I lost it. Had some shit cravings earlier, but then went to the gym and worked out for 1 1/2 hours.....so thats 2 goals that I have done work on today so far. I finished spring cleaning my bedroom and have thrown out heaps of stuff...watch out stevo, Im in a toss it out mood.
Going shortly to find out how much it would cost to frame some paintings we bought various places and to get some photos printed up of our holiday to put up in our room. Now Im working on spring cleaning the kitchen..eww, it needs it.
Anyways, onward, another craving has just hit, so I will hit the shower....distraction works.
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Saturday, September 17, 2011
100 day challenge
Well today is 100 days until Christmas day!!
I'm going to give myself the best Christmas present ever, 100 days of living with intention, 100 days of concentrating on my set of goals and visualising what it will be like when they are achieved. So, where to start
Goals for the next 100 days are
1. To be the mean lean fighting machine that I should be. Time is passing and my body is really not coping well with the extra weight I'm carrying around. So, for the next 100 days, I will be exercising every day....at least 5 days a week at the gym, and two days doing extra incidental exercise.
2. To not be smoking....well, that says it all. 5 years ago, I gave up smoking for my daughters 10th Birthday, on Monday she turns 15, so I'm going to use that day as my quit day.
3. To turn this house into a home that I can be proud of, so every day, decluttering a bit more, cleaning carpets and walls and light fittings.
4. To work with Stef more, getting her to use her IPad more, and giving her more lifeskills. 30 minutes a day at least of Stef 1 : 1
5. To do something nice every day....doesnt have to be huge, a simple letting someone in front of me at the shop, a bunch of flowers for a friend or driving more politely. Doing things for other people makes you feel good.
6. To get through the unfinished business list. Work is happening on this, but I really want to finish so much.
7. To get on to my vegetable garden, and make it a productive piece of dirt again. Its spring, so its time to turn it over, get some plants and a fence to keep the chooks out.
8.To work on my back patio area and make it a relaxing sanctuary that we need.
Ok, the list is long enough....100 day challenge is about consistency in working on the goals, so everyday doing something towards each one will keep me pretty busy, but it gets results, so onward I go
I'm going to give myself the best Christmas present ever, 100 days of living with intention, 100 days of concentrating on my set of goals and visualising what it will be like when they are achieved. So, where to start
Goals for the next 100 days are
1. To be the mean lean fighting machine that I should be. Time is passing and my body is really not coping well with the extra weight I'm carrying around. So, for the next 100 days, I will be exercising every day....at least 5 days a week at the gym, and two days doing extra incidental exercise.
2. To not be smoking....well, that says it all. 5 years ago, I gave up smoking for my daughters 10th Birthday, on Monday she turns 15, so I'm going to use that day as my quit day.
3. To turn this house into a home that I can be proud of, so every day, decluttering a bit more, cleaning carpets and walls and light fittings.
4. To work with Stef more, getting her to use her IPad more, and giving her more lifeskills. 30 minutes a day at least of Stef 1 : 1
5. To do something nice every day....doesnt have to be huge, a simple letting someone in front of me at the shop, a bunch of flowers for a friend or driving more politely. Doing things for other people makes you feel good.
6. To get through the unfinished business list. Work is happening on this, but I really want to finish so much.
7. To get on to my vegetable garden, and make it a productive piece of dirt again. Its spring, so its time to turn it over, get some plants and a fence to keep the chooks out.
8.To work on my back patio area and make it a relaxing sanctuary that we need.
Ok, the list is long enough....100 day challenge is about consistency in working on the goals, so everyday doing something towards each one will keep me pretty busy, but it gets results, so onward I go
Monday, August 15, 2011
Woohoo Monday, the start of a new week!
I always feel, that when I wake up every Monday morning, its new week, a new start and a new page. This week I have big plans on what I want to achieve as always.
Working hard at gym and really trying hard to be very consistent. Ramping it up slightly...and doing more weights and abs. I am really starting to see the results..not so much on the weight side, but certainly the measurements are coming down. Two inches off my weight and 1.5 off my ass....hey thats not bad in two weeks. What is even more suprising is that my knee is actually improving dramatically. Where it used to be quite sore all the time, its actually not even sore, just occasionally clicking out backwards (which it has done for years). Its certainly becoming more stable as well.
This week I am going to work hard on the house. There is a lot to do as always, but I just want the house to be neater, a heap of stuff to throw out while the trailer is getting ready to go to the tip. I am also going to plan out what we are going to do with Jacks room. Poor kid is suffering with allergies, so we will be ripping up his carpet, getting rid of some of the flat spaces that collect dust and give him a lot of storage areas for his stuff. Looking at getting him a bed/desk combo....a loft bed. I am also going to plan out my wardrobe. Im putting in an organisational system...there is a lot of wasted space in there, looking at putting more shelving and places for everything.
I took the oldest two kids to the RMIT open day yesterday. I just want to show them that there are so many alternatives for them. I think somehow Brent is a little scared of the future....of moving on from school. Change is something that autistic kids don't do easily and moving on from the protective environment of school is probably the biggest change of all. He really isnt doing as well with his VCE as he needs to and I really am worried about what the future brings for him. What will be will be I guess. Melinda has so many choices at this stage, and really sees that she will need to work hard to get into the courses she wants, but she is so capable.
I might go into work today...I have a bit of organisational stuff to do...a bit of unfinished stuff which I really want to get organised. Always a lot to do..In some ways though, I really think that today I should concentrate on the house and the family stuff.
Anyways, on with the day. Time to get MJ out of bed....
Working hard at gym and really trying hard to be very consistent. Ramping it up slightly...and doing more weights and abs. I am really starting to see the results..not so much on the weight side, but certainly the measurements are coming down. Two inches off my weight and 1.5 off my ass....hey thats not bad in two weeks. What is even more suprising is that my knee is actually improving dramatically. Where it used to be quite sore all the time, its actually not even sore, just occasionally clicking out backwards (which it has done for years). Its certainly becoming more stable as well.
This week I am going to work hard on the house. There is a lot to do as always, but I just want the house to be neater, a heap of stuff to throw out while the trailer is getting ready to go to the tip. I am also going to plan out what we are going to do with Jacks room. Poor kid is suffering with allergies, so we will be ripping up his carpet, getting rid of some of the flat spaces that collect dust and give him a lot of storage areas for his stuff. Looking at getting him a bed/desk combo....a loft bed. I am also going to plan out my wardrobe. Im putting in an organisational system...there is a lot of wasted space in there, looking at putting more shelving and places for everything.
I took the oldest two kids to the RMIT open day yesterday. I just want to show them that there are so many alternatives for them. I think somehow Brent is a little scared of the future....of moving on from school. Change is something that autistic kids don't do easily and moving on from the protective environment of school is probably the biggest change of all. He really isnt doing as well with his VCE as he needs to and I really am worried about what the future brings for him. What will be will be I guess. Melinda has so many choices at this stage, and really sees that she will need to work hard to get into the courses she wants, but she is so capable.
I might go into work today...I have a bit of organisational stuff to do...a bit of unfinished stuff which I really want to get organised. Always a lot to do..In some ways though, I really think that today I should concentrate on the house and the family stuff.
Anyways, on with the day. Time to get MJ out of bed....
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Woohoo, its hump day!!
Busy day ahead!!
3 loads of washing already done, dishwasher unstacked and restacked, petrol in the car and lounge being tidied now....its not even 6.30am yet.
I have work today, looking forward to it. I really love my job. Then its to the gym for cardio training, drum lessons for Jack, home, cooking cleaning and looking after kids. Its a busy sort of day, but never do have any time to be bored.
Brent had two SACS yesterday....said he did ok, but we will see.
Heard from my cousin in England...everything is just fine in downtown Dorking.....LMAO, I couldnt live in a place with such a dorky sounding name. Its sad to see beautiful London in such turmoil, but really, the pollies are just not in touch with their constituents. High youth unemployment leaves the kids feeling as if no one cares. They have no hopes or aspirations as their are not enough unskilled jobs, and the public school system really is pathetic. I saw so much when I was over there.
Hoping Stef is finally cleaned out today..poor kid, the whole bowel stuff really is such a problem. She is on massive amounts of laxatives at the moment. She is being really good with it though...keeping herself clean. Oh and she is writing nearly all her numbers now....neatly too. She really has come a long way this year. The teacher really took it on board that I saw them as babysitters and that they really should do far more with her as she is capable.
MJ has a cold, so I kept her home yesterday too.
Really getting used to making exercise a not negotiable part of my day. I have lost 3kg so far....not bad considering I only started exercising this time last week. I am being really careful with what I am eating too..the CSIRO diet is great. Energy levels are very high, and I just feel really good on it.
Anyways...on with the day.....time to get the kids up and at em
3 loads of washing already done, dishwasher unstacked and restacked, petrol in the car and lounge being tidied now....its not even 6.30am yet.
I have work today, looking forward to it. I really love my job. Then its to the gym for cardio training, drum lessons for Jack, home, cooking cleaning and looking after kids. Its a busy sort of day, but never do have any time to be bored.
Brent had two SACS yesterday....said he did ok, but we will see.
Heard from my cousin in England...everything is just fine in downtown Dorking.....LMAO, I couldnt live in a place with such a dorky sounding name. Its sad to see beautiful London in such turmoil, but really, the pollies are just not in touch with their constituents. High youth unemployment leaves the kids feeling as if no one cares. They have no hopes or aspirations as their are not enough unskilled jobs, and the public school system really is pathetic. I saw so much when I was over there.
Hoping Stef is finally cleaned out today..poor kid, the whole bowel stuff really is such a problem. She is on massive amounts of laxatives at the moment. She is being really good with it though...keeping herself clean. Oh and she is writing nearly all her numbers now....neatly too. She really has come a long way this year. The teacher really took it on board that I saw them as babysitters and that they really should do far more with her as she is capable.
MJ has a cold, so I kept her home yesterday too.
Really getting used to making exercise a not negotiable part of my day. I have lost 3kg so far....not bad considering I only started exercising this time last week. I am being really careful with what I am eating too..the CSIRO diet is great. Energy levels are very high, and I just feel really good on it.
Anyways...on with the day.....time to get the kids up and at em
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
Tuesday....hmm, gee time flies
Ah Tuesday, and I didnt get everything I wanted to do done yesterday, but progress in this house is in babysteps.
Giving Stef the day off today. Poor kid is having bowel issues again, so I have dosed her up on laxatives last night and hopefully that will create some movement today. Means though that gym will have to wait until the kids get home from school.
Oh and the gobbledocks raided the cupboards yesterday. I can't believe that these kids ate 4 batches of biscuits in two days.....whats with this guys, those biscuits were supposed to last the week.
Brent has an English SAC today....it has been so hard to get him to work on it at all. He really has so little motivation at the moment and its driving me insane. I don't know what he thinks he will be doing next year, but it wont be sitting on his ass playing computer games all day.....he either has to be studying or working or at least looking for work.
MJ is being stressed out about this choosing subjects for next year....different people are telling her what she should be doing and they dont really understand what her end goal is. I keep telling her that she should just go with her original choices.
OK, on with the day, no milk, no bread, no biscuits this morning, so I guess the shop is the first stop.
Giving Stef the day off today. Poor kid is having bowel issues again, so I have dosed her up on laxatives last night and hopefully that will create some movement today. Means though that gym will have to wait until the kids get home from school.
Oh and the gobbledocks raided the cupboards yesterday. I can't believe that these kids ate 4 batches of biscuits in two days.....whats with this guys, those biscuits were supposed to last the week.
Brent has an English SAC today....it has been so hard to get him to work on it at all. He really has so little motivation at the moment and its driving me insane. I don't know what he thinks he will be doing next year, but it wont be sitting on his ass playing computer games all day.....he either has to be studying or working or at least looking for work.
MJ is being stressed out about this choosing subjects for next year....different people are telling her what she should be doing and they dont really understand what her end goal is. I keep telling her that she should just go with her original choices.
OK, on with the day, no milk, no bread, no biscuits this morning, so I guess the shop is the first stop.
Monday, August 8, 2011
A new day and a new week!
Feeling pretty good and positive about the week ahead. I woke up really really early...4am, wide awake. Folded a mountain of washing and have basically planned out my week.
Exercising is starting to become easier...I really am committed to 30 minutes of cardio every day....and its working. I lost 2.5 kg last week, all off my stomach area I think as I certainly am losing the feeling of having a tyre around my stomach. I'm rapt...I guess for me, I just have to make it part of my everyday to make the 30 minutes for me. OH and being on a healthy eating plan is great...so much more energetic on this diet...or not really a diet, but more watching the portions and taking the healthier options. Lots of vegetables, and lots of fibre.
This week I have vowed to complete some of my unfinished business and to keep up to the wshing that these little darlings create. I really must find time to spend with my mum too...feel like I have neglected her a bit.
Saving for the Italy trip well...was a bit naughty today shouldnt watch the shopping shows at 4am. Bought a new steam mop...looks pretty damned good, and doubles as a steamer to clean grout and windows etc.
Anyways, time to get a move on...Stefs already breakfasted and in the bath....now to get her dressed.
Exercising is starting to become easier...I really am committed to 30 minutes of cardio every day....and its working. I lost 2.5 kg last week, all off my stomach area I think as I certainly am losing the feeling of having a tyre around my stomach. I'm rapt...I guess for me, I just have to make it part of my everyday to make the 30 minutes for me. OH and being on a healthy eating plan is great...so much more energetic on this diet...or not really a diet, but more watching the portions and taking the healthier options. Lots of vegetables, and lots of fibre.
This week I have vowed to complete some of my unfinished business and to keep up to the wshing that these little darlings create. I really must find time to spend with my mum too...feel like I have neglected her a bit.
Saving for the Italy trip well...was a bit naughty today shouldnt watch the shopping shows at 4am. Bought a new steam mop...looks pretty damned good, and doubles as a steamer to clean grout and windows etc.
Anyways, time to get a move on...Stefs already breakfasted and in the bath....now to get her dressed.
Saturday, August 6, 2011
It's working!!
I have been so good working out. Weighed myself yesterday and the weight drop is amazing 2.1 kg in 5 days!! I am certainly feeling a bit fitter..at the start of the week I felt stuffed after 5 minutes on the eliptical....now I am easily doing 35 minutes of cardio. 10 minutes on the treadmill, 10 minutes on the eliptical, 5 minutes on the step machine and 10 minutes on the bike, well not exactly easily, but Im getting through it without stopping and my speeds are increasing.
Yesterday was such a busy day, by the end I just felt absolutely stuffed..fell asleep really really early. Today I am hitting the housework and the washing. Oh and my italian lessons arrived so thats great. Can start on it tomorrow.
OMG, just saw a show on hoarders...our place is nothing compared to that....but I really want to get rid of a lot of stuff. This week I am concentrating on the kitchen, scrubbing the whole lot down.
Damn not being able to sleep ...its only 5am, and already i am up and about.
Yesterday was such a busy day, by the end I just felt absolutely stuffed..fell asleep really really early. Today I am hitting the housework and the washing. Oh and my italian lessons arrived so thats great. Can start on it tomorrow.
OMG, just saw a show on hoarders...our place is nothing compared to that....but I really want to get rid of a lot of stuff. This week I am concentrating on the kitchen, scrubbing the whole lot down.
Damn not being able to sleep ...its only 5am, and already i am up and about.
Friday, August 5, 2011
Drowning in unfinished business
OMG at the moment I have so many things that are half done, or important things not done at all. I feel as if I'm drowning in my unfinshed business. I really need to set aside an hour a day to work on these thi gs u til i can catch up!!
On a good note, I finally started my fitness and health reime. I need to make my health a priority in my life. time is marching on and my body will not keep up unless i am a mean lean fighting machine. I aim to do 30 minutes of cardio every day as a matter of routine. weights and ab work 3 timesa week. I so want to be slimaand energetic.
saaving madly for Italy...it will be so much fun. I actually feel thatfor the first timeinmy lifethat i have so much to lookforward to and thatmy life is MINE! still tossing around what course to do, but leaning towards one jus outside rome. Learning Italian madly so that when i get there, i can emerse myself i the culture. I think that when you travel, its all about the richness and diversity of people that makes it allworth while. seeing castles and cathedrals is great, but only part of what its Ll about. You can see sights in photos, but its the culture that makes it so different.
anyway, on withthe show. A busy day ahead! finance meeting at school, going to work to catch up on shit, cardio,abs and weights, housework and not to mention being mum...lol life is busy!!!
On a good note, I finally started my fitness and health reime. I need to make my health a priority in my life. time is marching on and my body will not keep up unless i am a mean lean fighting machine. I aim to do 30 minutes of cardio every day as a matter of routine. weights and ab work 3 timesa week. I so want to be slimaand energetic.
saaving madly for Italy...it will be so much fun. I actually feel thatfor the first timeinmy lifethat i have so much to lookforward to and thatmy life is MINE! still tossing around what course to do, but leaning towards one jus outside rome. Learning Italian madly so that when i get there, i can emerse myself i the culture. I think that when you travel, its all about the richness and diversity of people that makes it allworth while. seeing castles and cathedrals is great, but only part of what its Ll about. You can see sights in photos, but its the culture that makes it so different.
anyway, on withthe show. A busy day ahead! finance meeting at school, going to work to catch up on shit, cardio,abs and weights, housework and not to mention being mum...lol life is busy!!!
Thursday, July 21, 2011
A new day
At least at work I am catching up! I still have a huge day ahead of me, but things are getting there. I'm looking forward to working just my 11 hours a week soon.
Steve is having Friday off with me! That will be so good just to chill together. We really don't get a lot of time together when exhaustion doesnt take its toll.
Melinda is very excited, she is so looking forsward to year 11 now, especially as she doesnt have to do maths. The world really is her oyster, she is good at so many subjects.
House is getting tidier....bit by bit. Today i am still concentrating on getting the lounge room clean and tidy. Its still yuck, but its getting there. I cant believe how quickly the damn spidies spin new webs though.
Bit by bit...step by step and I will get through this rough patch.
My oldest brother is still being an arse to my mum. He really is a control freak and has tried to boss her around. OMG, its up to her to do what she wants.
Steve is having Friday off with me! That will be so good just to chill together. We really don't get a lot of time together when exhaustion doesnt take its toll.
Melinda is very excited, she is so looking forsward to year 11 now, especially as she doesnt have to do maths. The world really is her oyster, she is good at so many subjects.
House is getting tidier....bit by bit. Today i am still concentrating on getting the lounge room clean and tidy. Its still yuck, but its getting there. I cant believe how quickly the damn spidies spin new webs though.
Bit by bit...step by step and I will get through this rough patch.
My oldest brother is still being an arse to my mum. He really is a control freak and has tried to boss her around. OMG, its up to her to do what she wants.
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Getting out of a rut
I hit a major rut....maybe a bit depressed after seeing a bit more of the world and having something that I looked forward to so long being over.
I have so much unfinished business right now that it depresses me to being overwhelmed. The house is gross, but bit by bit it is improving and will continue to do so if I stay on track. Thank goodness for Cozi...it certainly is keeping me on track.
I scrubbed the grout in the family room yesterday...OMG it looks so much brighter. Now onto the lounge room detail.
Saving madly to get to Italy next year. Still not sure what course to do, but it will be fun no matter what. Learning Italian is going very well. Ordered the next course online. Hopefully it will arrive soon!!
Goals for the day....2009 Tax, 2 more loads of washing, undies and clean lounge and bathroom.
I have so much unfinished business right now that it depresses me to being overwhelmed. The house is gross, but bit by bit it is improving and will continue to do so if I stay on track. Thank goodness for Cozi...it certainly is keeping me on track.
I scrubbed the grout in the family room yesterday...OMG it looks so much brighter. Now onto the lounge room detail.
Saving madly to get to Italy next year. Still not sure what course to do, but it will be fun no matter what. Learning Italian is going very well. Ordered the next course online. Hopefully it will arrive soon!!
Goals for the day....2009 Tax, 2 more loads of washing, undies and clean lounge and bathroom.
Monday, May 23, 2011
End of second day...so much walking, but so much fun!
Rang Peter last night, he sounds ex cited that I will be seeing him and Liz as i am. It's been so long,but last night when we talked the years just melted away. I don't think he can quite believe how independent I am and that really I am so content on my own.
It's so funny being on my own...it's something I relish! With 4 kids I guess I had forgotten what it is like to be truly alone and responsible for no one else. People are so funny though, they look at you with so much pity to see you on your own in restaurants...but I love it. It's amazing how much food changes when you gan just sit and relish it with undivided attention. Omg though the number of men who try to pick you up is so damn funny. So far I could have had an entire south African rugby team, two American businessmen, one African, one zimbabwean, two German and an adorable Englishman who was captain of the ferry. It's ok Stevo, there will only ever be you...you re my world!!! I eve had to get the concierge of the hotel to tell this very young Italian man Dario to kindly leave me alone...giggilo!!! LOL said he would give me the experience of my dreams...lol he doesn't know my Steve!
stoking up on a hearty breakfast as it comes with the room and saves time at lunch...just deciding the agenda for the day. Maybe Brittish music experience and then shopping. I will know when I hit the station which way I will go...oh freedom to choose my path with no consideration for anyone else...BLISS!!!
Getting around London is so easy and so much fun and people actually talk to you. The odd metal detecctor and xray of the bags at different spots. Got checked at the o2 and the museum
British music experience was great.. I realize just how much I'm into the whole music bit! also realize just how much of a divide there is between England and Ireland. Virtually no mention of u2 even visiting here. definitely shopping tomorrow and abbey road and rock tour.
Oh and I did the tower of london today... I was surprised how much I already knew about, so after wandering through I sat down and just soaked it in. A beefeater came and sat next to me and we chatted a while. He lives on site. he said that some parts are quite eerie at night even to him. HE tested my history knowledge a bit and said I knew more than 99% of the population. He could see why I was more interested in just soaking it all in. I always liked English history.
I walked miles today... See so much more walking. Blitz shelters, dungeons, churches, which I would have completely missed. I often felt that if only walls could talk, what a tale they would tell.
No shows on tonight, so maybe an early one...no pubs open either!
had a nice hot bath to soothe the muscles..going by the maps I walked 15 or more km! Don't feel guilty about having chocolate mud pie for dessert now!
It's so funny being on my own...it's something I relish! With 4 kids I guess I had forgotten what it is like to be truly alone and responsible for no one else. People are so funny though, they look at you with so much pity to see you on your own in restaurants...but I love it. It's amazing how much food changes when you gan just sit and relish it with undivided attention. Omg though the number of men who try to pick you up is so damn funny. So far I could have had an entire south African rugby team, two American businessmen, one African, one zimbabwean, two German and an adorable Englishman who was captain of the ferry. It's ok Stevo, there will only ever be you...you re my world!!! I eve had to get the concierge of the hotel to tell this very young Italian man Dario to kindly leave me alone...giggilo!!! LOL said he would give me the experience of my dreams...lol he doesn't know my Steve!
stoking up on a hearty breakfast as it comes with the room and saves time at lunch...just deciding the agenda for the day. Maybe Brittish music experience and then shopping. I will know when I hit the station which way I will go...oh freedom to choose my path with no consideration for anyone else...BLISS!!!
Getting around London is so easy and so much fun and people actually talk to you. The odd metal detecctor and xray of the bags at different spots. Got checked at the o2 and the museum
British music experience was great.. I realize just how much I'm into the whole music bit! also realize just how much of a divide there is between England and Ireland. Virtually no mention of u2 even visiting here. definitely shopping tomorrow and abbey road and rock tour.
Oh and I did the tower of london today... I was surprised how much I already knew about, so after wandering through I sat down and just soaked it in. A beefeater came and sat next to me and we chatted a while. He lives on site. he said that some parts are quite eerie at night even to him. HE tested my history knowledge a bit and said I knew more than 99% of the population. He could see why I was more interested in just soaking it all in. I always liked English history.
I walked miles today... See so much more walking. Blitz shelters, dungeons, churches, which I would have completely missed. I often felt that if only walls could talk, what a tale they would tell.
No shows on tonight, so maybe an early one...no pubs open either!
had a nice hot bath to soothe the muscles..going by the maps I walked 15 or more km! Don't feel guilty about having chocolate mud pie for dessert now!
First day in London woohoo
Sitting in a little back garden in a cafe in Greenwich. looking up at the tiny windows and the brickwork and just imagining the history that these little yards could tell. My family were seafarers as were some members of Steve's. Who knows, maybe they were here so many years ago.
I have been blown away by the history. Everywhere I look is history. Places I have heard of, events in time that I have read about. What also strikes me, is that the monuments arent kept away from the people. In Trafalgar Square it was so wonderful to watch people climbing all over the brass lions. It was as if they belonged. Took a ferry down the river. Great move. You get a real sense of a colorful past. I can just imagine my great grandfather arranging his crew in one of the many hotels in Greenwich and had a drink to his history in the Greenwich hotel,
Had a good laugh with some rugby players from south Africa taking photos of an old telep hone booth and I dared them to see how many people they could cram in...lol 7 big guys all with faces pressed up against the glass! Ended up going to the Sherlock Holmes hotel and being shouted my first pint of English beer. I still think it would taste better cold!!
They wanted me to conti nue on in their pub crawl, but alas I want to see so much!
Went to the o'oo line. Heaps of. People gathering there in case the world ends...what a load of crockshit.
trying to ring Peter, but I don't know quite how the numbers work here
So willq go and ask at the concierge. ALways sirens going but expected as its a major road.
Absolutely perfect weather all day, just so clear and warm. The best day!
I have been blown away by the history. Everywhere I look is history. Places I have heard of, events in time that I have read about. What also strikes me, is that the monuments arent kept away from the people. In Trafalgar Square it was so wonderful to watch people climbing all over the brass lions. It was as if they belonged. Took a ferry down the river. Great move. You get a real sense of a colorful past. I can just imagine my great grandfather arranging his crew in one of the many hotels in Greenwich and had a drink to his history in the Greenwich hotel,
Had a good laugh with some rugby players from south Africa taking photos of an old telep hone booth and I dared them to see how many people they could cram in...lol 7 big guys all with faces pressed up against the glass! Ended up going to the Sherlock Holmes hotel and being shouted my first pint of English beer. I still think it would taste better cold!!
They wanted me to conti nue on in their pub crawl, but alas I want to see so much!
Went to the o'oo line. Heaps of. People gathering there in case the world ends...what a load of crockshit.
trying to ring Peter, but I don't know quite how the numbers work here
So willq go and ask at the concierge. ALways sirens going but expected as its a major road.
Absolutely perfect weather all day, just so clear and warm. The best day!
Monday, April 18, 2011
Am I so different?
I had a shocking week....went into a real downward spiral about long term prospects. It really is quite scary this whole carer's bit.
It started with someone saying they didnt want the responsibility of looking after Stef while we were away. And it ended with me thinking OMG in 5 years time I will have not only the full time carers role of Stef, but maybe my inlaws as well.
Anyway, the upshot is, I have reached out to different organisations to help us, including residential respite care. Hopefully that will come about for this holiday, but also for future times. I have always shied away from residential care...have heard some major horror stories, but hey, I can't do this forever and I will always need breaks from the caring role at times. I realise too, that if it were one of my family who had a special needs child or adult, that I would be offering to help along the way, even so the family could have a meal or something. I wouldnt be sitting back in my selfish little world.
On Saturday night, we were on our way out, a car immediately in front of us crashed into the car in front of him, and then took off. We of course pulled over and helped the young kids in the car hit. I just couldnt believe the lack of care or the selfishness of the person who hit them. I also realised that there was no way I couldnt stop to make sure the kids were ok. They were shaken up, and the car was a bit of a mess but drivable for now, but I'm glad we stopped, even if it did make us really late.
Stef had a great time at the kids' disco. Loved the music the dancing and the lights. It was lovely to watch her smile on the dance floor having such a good time. Thanks to Sharon from the Autism treehouse for organising this. It comes as a bit of a shock to me, but Stef really is one of the most autistic kids in Geelong. I guess I just dont want to see her disability, but see the beautiful girl underneath it. I know I always try hard to focus on what she can do, not what she can't, so it comes as a bit of a shock when you realise just how much her autism affects her. I am proud of the fact that we are able to take her out and about....that we can do things as a family. A lot of people can't or won't. Thats why autism is just such a hidden away disability. We certainly get a lot of people who just stare...thats their problem not ours.
Anyway, I'm out of the spiral now...on with the job, and looking at ways to get around things rather than seeing the blocks sitting in our way. I can't wait to see the world!!
It started with someone saying they didnt want the responsibility of looking after Stef while we were away. And it ended with me thinking OMG in 5 years time I will have not only the full time carers role of Stef, but maybe my inlaws as well.
Anyway, the upshot is, I have reached out to different organisations to help us, including residential respite care. Hopefully that will come about for this holiday, but also for future times. I have always shied away from residential care...have heard some major horror stories, but hey, I can't do this forever and I will always need breaks from the caring role at times. I realise too, that if it were one of my family who had a special needs child or adult, that I would be offering to help along the way, even so the family could have a meal or something. I wouldnt be sitting back in my selfish little world.
On Saturday night, we were on our way out, a car immediately in front of us crashed into the car in front of him, and then took off. We of course pulled over and helped the young kids in the car hit. I just couldnt believe the lack of care or the selfishness of the person who hit them. I also realised that there was no way I couldnt stop to make sure the kids were ok. They were shaken up, and the car was a bit of a mess but drivable for now, but I'm glad we stopped, even if it did make us really late.
Stef had a great time at the kids' disco. Loved the music the dancing and the lights. It was lovely to watch her smile on the dance floor having such a good time. Thanks to Sharon from the Autism treehouse for organising this. It comes as a bit of a shock to me, but Stef really is one of the most autistic kids in Geelong. I guess I just dont want to see her disability, but see the beautiful girl underneath it. I know I always try hard to focus on what she can do, not what she can't, so it comes as a bit of a shock when you realise just how much her autism affects her. I am proud of the fact that we are able to take her out and about....that we can do things as a family. A lot of people can't or won't. Thats why autism is just such a hidden away disability. We certainly get a lot of people who just stare...thats their problem not ours.
Anyway, I'm out of the spiral now...on with the job, and looking at ways to get around things rather than seeing the blocks sitting in our way. I can't wait to see the world!!
Friday, April 8, 2011
Parent Teacher Interviews......FRUSTRATION
Had Brent's Parent/Teacher interviews last night....PURE FRUSTRATION.
Frustration from all the teachers. All of them said....Brent is capable of being an A+ student..academically brilliant mind, but he just isnt doing enough work. His disorganisation is letting him down big time and he is just purely LAZY. I had one teacher who was almost in tears as she can see this beautifully talented mind, but can see him stuffing it all up. His legal teacher was so angry with him he could barely talk to us. Bloody kid!!
How can I get through to this kid..it's only 20 more weeks.he needs to put in big time..show them what he is truly capable of. Not only that, that he truly won't be happy doing menial work for the rest of his life and that Uni will be so great for him. Great because he will find people of like mind, will find friends that truly understand him as a person, stimulates his mind and puts him in a path for success at whatever he choses to do.
I have so much work to do with him over the holidays....time to get him totally organised..set up a better study environment in the house where I can see that he is working and not just mucking around on the internet in his room. I need to make sure I see his SAC work, before he hands it in and I need to make sure that I know when all the SACS are due so I can keep him on track for success.
Sometimes I feel that he is still a toddler and Im having to spoon feed him.
Tomorrow is Kieran's funeral..I just can't go.....its all a bit close to home for me. I've turned my grief into the will to fight for the GPS systems...its what I can do, to prevent this happening again.
Anyway, its the last day of term for these darlings. MJ and Brent are going to have to look after the others on the days that I work during school holidays, but apart from that..no plans at this stage.
Frustration from all the teachers. All of them said....Brent is capable of being an A+ student..academically brilliant mind, but he just isnt doing enough work. His disorganisation is letting him down big time and he is just purely LAZY. I had one teacher who was almost in tears as she can see this beautifully talented mind, but can see him stuffing it all up. His legal teacher was so angry with him he could barely talk to us. Bloody kid!!
How can I get through to this kid..it's only 20 more weeks.he needs to put in big time..show them what he is truly capable of. Not only that, that he truly won't be happy doing menial work for the rest of his life and that Uni will be so great for him. Great because he will find people of like mind, will find friends that truly understand him as a person, stimulates his mind and puts him in a path for success at whatever he choses to do.
I have so much work to do with him over the holidays....time to get him totally organised..set up a better study environment in the house where I can see that he is working and not just mucking around on the internet in his room. I need to make sure I see his SAC work, before he hands it in and I need to make sure that I know when all the SACS are due so I can keep him on track for success.
Sometimes I feel that he is still a toddler and Im having to spoon feed him.
Tomorrow is Kieran's funeral..I just can't go.....its all a bit close to home for me. I've turned my grief into the will to fight for the GPS systems...its what I can do, to prevent this happening again.
Anyway, its the last day of term for these darlings. MJ and Brent are going to have to look after the others on the days that I work during school holidays, but apart from that..no plans at this stage.
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Woohoo, I found my mp3 player
I'm rapt, I found my MP3 player! I thought it was lost forever but instead, I had left it in my old handbag! I love my music, and my mp3 player has 500 of my most favourite songs. It ranges from mellow...the eagles, fleetwood mac to up...billy idol to songs with great memories like Jimmy barnes and chisel to Red hot Chilli Peppers, Kings of Leon, Pink and even some new bands from Melbourne. Music puts me in a great mental state.
Up again early this morning...4.45am, not good considering I went to sleep at 12.15am. Can blame Stevo for that one heheh.
Had takeaway from a Thai restaurant in Lara...excellent meal and very good value. Two courses and enough to feed 3 of us easily and leftovers. We don't do that often, but Steve got word of his bonus being paid next week, and it was a good one! Celebration time.
Anyway, time to get Stef up and organised, and hang out my third load of washing for the day...always stuff to do!
Up again early this morning...4.45am, not good considering I went to sleep at 12.15am. Can blame Stevo for that one heheh.
Had takeaway from a Thai restaurant in Lara...excellent meal and very good value. Two courses and enough to feed 3 of us easily and leftovers. We don't do that often, but Steve got word of his bonus being paid next week, and it was a good one! Celebration time.
Anyway, time to get Stef up and organised, and hang out my third load of washing for the day...always stuff to do!
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Ah Spa
Woke up very early this morning...like 3.30am. Just lay there for a while, but couldnt get back to sleep so I got up.
Its not so bad, have done lots this morning. LOL, chocolate muffins and hedgehog made by 5am...the wall unit and computer desk decluttered by 5.30, and then a lovely spa.
Have changed the routine in this house a bit again. I used to wake up Melinda first, but yesterday because Stef was awake at 6.30, I put her in the bath first. IT WAS GREAT! Stef was so much more relaxed, had the time to get dressed herself, helped me make her breakfast and actually ate it. So, from now on, its Stef up first!
Had photos taken for newspaper yesterday. I just so want this GPS stuff to go ahead.
I know my blog yesterday seemed a bit like a complaint fest. Its not what I wanted it to be, but I really need for people to understand that although we look as if we are doing so well, underneath the water, we are always paddling so hard just to keep a float.
On friday, I heard this stupid ignorant woman say in a lift what a poor parent the mother of Kieran must have been. I was so angry at this. Sometimes being a parent of an autistic child is just so damned difficult and those people who have only ever had normal children would never ever understand the shit we go through. I honestly almost slapped her, but took the high ground, called her ignorant and walked away...
Oh and a mate is fixing my laptop for me...he really is a darling. I offered to pay, but he says no because I offered to lend him it when he needed a computer...I guess thats what mates are for.
I realised too, that I do care very deeply for people. Not just those I know, but also those I dont. I realise, I would never walk past a crying child, or a fallen elderly person...its just not in my nature. They say that all those people who say they saw Kieran are lying, just to get their name in the paper. I don't know whats worse......driving past a lost child, or lying in the aftermath. Stupid selfish twits.
Anyway, its the pointy end of the day.....time to get the kids organised!!
Its not so bad, have done lots this morning. LOL, chocolate muffins and hedgehog made by 5am...the wall unit and computer desk decluttered by 5.30, and then a lovely spa.
Have changed the routine in this house a bit again. I used to wake up Melinda first, but yesterday because Stef was awake at 6.30, I put her in the bath first. IT WAS GREAT! Stef was so much more relaxed, had the time to get dressed herself, helped me make her breakfast and actually ate it. So, from now on, its Stef up first!
Had photos taken for newspaper yesterday. I just so want this GPS stuff to go ahead.
I know my blog yesterday seemed a bit like a complaint fest. Its not what I wanted it to be, but I really need for people to understand that although we look as if we are doing so well, underneath the water, we are always paddling so hard just to keep a float.
On friday, I heard this stupid ignorant woman say in a lift what a poor parent the mother of Kieran must have been. I was so angry at this. Sometimes being a parent of an autistic child is just so damned difficult and those people who have only ever had normal children would never ever understand the shit we go through. I honestly almost slapped her, but took the high ground, called her ignorant and walked away...
Oh and a mate is fixing my laptop for me...he really is a darling. I offered to pay, but he says no because I offered to lend him it when he needed a computer...I guess thats what mates are for.
I realised too, that I do care very deeply for people. Not just those I know, but also those I dont. I realise, I would never walk past a crying child, or a fallen elderly person...its just not in my nature. They say that all those people who say they saw Kieran are lying, just to get their name in the paper. I don't know whats worse......driving past a lost child, or lying in the aftermath. Stupid selfish twits.
Anyway, its the pointy end of the day.....time to get the kids organised!!
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
How much do other people really get what we go through???
It was the other night, after having a major argument with my oldest brother, that I realised that so few people really GET what we go through and have endured on our travels with autism. Or why the fight for this GPS system for absconderers is just so important to me.
How many people would know just what it is like to have a child missing...let alone one which can't even say her own name. For those who havent been there, its like losing a much loved dog only about 10000 times worse. The feeling of total panic. fear of finding them dead, fear of some unscrupulous person picking them up. Its the worst possible feeling. When Stef went on one of her major wanders and turned up safe and well, I threw up for about an hour, had the shakes and just felt so awful. I think it was the overload of adrenaline.
Some family members just don't get, that a family bbq in a park is just too hard for us. Yes, Stef and I go out and about, we go to the markets and to parks, shopping, even to the show, but throw in trying to keep her safe and having conversations, now thats something I just can't do. I cannot afford to be distracted one little bit when we are out, especially near water. She slips away with the stealth of a ninja. One of us always has to be 100 per cent on guard duty. I would never trust anyone but us to take her out and about...our radars have been on for so long, it almost becomes second nature to keep an eye out for her at all times. No one ever gets a 100percent conversation unless we are at home and we know its safe.
People also don't realise that I on lots of occasions am extremely sleep deprived. I crash out at 9pm...sometimes its because I get up so early, but at others, its because Stef has woken up for parties at 1, 2 or 3am...running through the house turning on every light and the tv. I find I have to get up, just to keep her a little quiet so that the rest of the household can sleep. Steve drives a long way to work, and I worry that if his sleep is disrupted too much, he will fall asleep at the wheel. Sleep disturbance is a huge part of autism. Even Brent finds sleeping difficult and is often still up at 1am. I often hear him through the bedroom wall, tossing and turning.
Oh and then there is the additional housework around this place. Stef has no concept of personal hygiene or helping to keep the house clean..come to that none of the kids really get the whole keeping the house clean. Stef finds eating at the table with everyone else just too loud, and a little stressful. She grabs her food most of the time and runs off with it...leaving the scraps anywhere. A packet of chips means chips all over the furniture, the floor, everywhere. Then there is the raiding of the cupboard.....finding chocolate chips everywhere, flour, rice, and whatever else she can get her hands on. I frequently shampoo carpet..at least every 6 weeks, and the couches. I vacuum nearly every second day and wash floors two or three times a week. The amount of washing is huge. Stef has bowel issues which means she leaks constantly......nothing in this place to have to change her completely 3 times a day. Oh and then there is the playing in the pooh.....eww. I probably do 3-4 times more housework than the average woman with two kids. Stef gets into so much stuff!
There is the extra help needed for homework, and to help stef with getting life skills. Its never ending.
Why am I telling you all this....to give you some understanding of the true bits of what autism means for some of us. To help you understand how such tragedies like Kieran's death can occur and why we need every bit of help along the way that we can get and that we simply don't get near the help that we need from the support services.
How many people would know just what it is like to have a child missing...let alone one which can't even say her own name. For those who havent been there, its like losing a much loved dog only about 10000 times worse. The feeling of total panic. fear of finding them dead, fear of some unscrupulous person picking them up. Its the worst possible feeling. When Stef went on one of her major wanders and turned up safe and well, I threw up for about an hour, had the shakes and just felt so awful. I think it was the overload of adrenaline.
Some family members just don't get, that a family bbq in a park is just too hard for us. Yes, Stef and I go out and about, we go to the markets and to parks, shopping, even to the show, but throw in trying to keep her safe and having conversations, now thats something I just can't do. I cannot afford to be distracted one little bit when we are out, especially near water. She slips away with the stealth of a ninja. One of us always has to be 100 per cent on guard duty. I would never trust anyone but us to take her out and about...our radars have been on for so long, it almost becomes second nature to keep an eye out for her at all times. No one ever gets a 100percent conversation unless we are at home and we know its safe.
People also don't realise that I on lots of occasions am extremely sleep deprived. I crash out at 9pm...sometimes its because I get up so early, but at others, its because Stef has woken up for parties at 1, 2 or 3am...running through the house turning on every light and the tv. I find I have to get up, just to keep her a little quiet so that the rest of the household can sleep. Steve drives a long way to work, and I worry that if his sleep is disrupted too much, he will fall asleep at the wheel. Sleep disturbance is a huge part of autism. Even Brent finds sleeping difficult and is often still up at 1am. I often hear him through the bedroom wall, tossing and turning.
Oh and then there is the additional housework around this place. Stef has no concept of personal hygiene or helping to keep the house clean..come to that none of the kids really get the whole keeping the house clean. Stef finds eating at the table with everyone else just too loud, and a little stressful. She grabs her food most of the time and runs off with it...leaving the scraps anywhere. A packet of chips means chips all over the furniture, the floor, everywhere. Then there is the raiding of the cupboard.....finding chocolate chips everywhere, flour, rice, and whatever else she can get her hands on. I frequently shampoo carpet..at least every 6 weeks, and the couches. I vacuum nearly every second day and wash floors two or three times a week. The amount of washing is huge. Stef has bowel issues which means she leaks constantly......nothing in this place to have to change her completely 3 times a day. Oh and then there is the playing in the pooh.....eww. I probably do 3-4 times more housework than the average woman with two kids. Stef gets into so much stuff!
There is the extra help needed for homework, and to help stef with getting life skills. Its never ending.
Why am I telling you all this....to give you some understanding of the true bits of what autism means for some of us. To help you understand how such tragedies like Kieran's death can occur and why we need every bit of help along the way that we can get and that we simply don't get near the help that we need from the support services.
Monday, April 4, 2011
Turning Negatives to positves!
This week has been a tough one. Last Tuesday night, a beautiful little boy with autism, wandered from his home in a nappy....along a busy highway where he was almost hit by cars and trucks, and then onto a railway track where he was hit by a train. It made me feel so icky......so angry that no-one stopped to help him...angry that we still havent got a gps system or emergency data base, ..and just devastated for this beautiful family who has such ignorant people saying things like, where was the mother, what bad parents they are..etc. I had such anger and hatred in my head....Anger is such a negative emotion. It doesnt do anything but eat you up inside. After a good sit down and think, I thought, I can use that energy to do something different and that is to use that energy to fight for what is truly right.
Anyway, Im now on a crusade..a crusade to stop this ever happening again. The technology is out there....we just need to make people see that there is a need to get it readily available to families.
Striking while the iron is hot.......been on the news, and now to keep on putting pressure on politicians, and in the media to get gps systems for these families, and those for other people with disabilities such as alzheimers..so that we never have another tragedy like this happening again.
I have such vivid memories of times that Stef has escaped from home...how panicked and fearful I felt, wandering around the streets calling her name. I will never forget. And the time that someone knocked on my door and said, oh, stef is up on rennie street....having left my beautiful girl in a risky situation rather than get involved. Or the time finding Stef jumping up and down in a river because she couldnt touch the bottom. There but for the grace of good fortune tragedy was avoided.
Anyways, busy today, between getting in touch with media, and cleaning up the dross from the weekend, catching up on washing and stuff.
Oh and we went to the autism awareness day in St Kilda. Stef was priceless....was so excited to see two thousand balloons flying up, I thought she was going to take off she was flapping so hard...oh and the smile on her face was just beautiful.
Had a big fight with my oldest brother on Friday night. He isnt happy about mum looking after the kids while we are away. He just wouldnt listen about what extra support we are looking at having in place for her. I ended up hanging up on him as he has no idea what we have gone through as a family for our kids, or how important it is for me to take time out when we can. He is purely selfish.....not once in 17 years has he ever offered to babysit for us...not even for 5 minutes have I ever left Stef in his care...and yet he thinks he knows it all. He has no fricking idea. Anyway, he then rang my mum and tried to lay the law down to her ...that she shouldnt be doing it, and that she is too old to be responsible, and that she wasnt well enough. Mum is going through a bit of a flat spot.......understandable as she has lost 2 good friends in the last 6 months. It happens like that when you are nearly 80, your friends are dying off. What is important is to stay involved with life, seek out companionship and be with people and thats just what mum is doing. Mum rang me later and said that she is quite ok to look after the kids, and that everything is ok to book the trip. I really wish he would mind his own business and stop trying to control other people.
Anyway, on with the day.....lots to do!!
Anyway, Im now on a crusade..a crusade to stop this ever happening again. The technology is out there....we just need to make people see that there is a need to get it readily available to families.
Striking while the iron is hot.......been on the news, and now to keep on putting pressure on politicians, and in the media to get gps systems for these families, and those for other people with disabilities such as alzheimers..so that we never have another tragedy like this happening again.
I have such vivid memories of times that Stef has escaped from home...how panicked and fearful I felt, wandering around the streets calling her name. I will never forget. And the time that someone knocked on my door and said, oh, stef is up on rennie street....having left my beautiful girl in a risky situation rather than get involved. Or the time finding Stef jumping up and down in a river because she couldnt touch the bottom. There but for the grace of good fortune tragedy was avoided.
Anyways, busy today, between getting in touch with media, and cleaning up the dross from the weekend, catching up on washing and stuff.
Oh and we went to the autism awareness day in St Kilda. Stef was priceless....was so excited to see two thousand balloons flying up, I thought she was going to take off she was flapping so hard...oh and the smile on her face was just beautiful.
Had a big fight with my oldest brother on Friday night. He isnt happy about mum looking after the kids while we are away. He just wouldnt listen about what extra support we are looking at having in place for her. I ended up hanging up on him as he has no idea what we have gone through as a family for our kids, or how important it is for me to take time out when we can. He is purely selfish.....not once in 17 years has he ever offered to babysit for us...not even for 5 minutes have I ever left Stef in his care...and yet he thinks he knows it all. He has no fricking idea. Anyway, he then rang my mum and tried to lay the law down to her ...that she shouldnt be doing it, and that she is too old to be responsible, and that she wasnt well enough. Mum is going through a bit of a flat spot.......understandable as she has lost 2 good friends in the last 6 months. It happens like that when you are nearly 80, your friends are dying off. What is important is to stay involved with life, seek out companionship and be with people and thats just what mum is doing. Mum rang me later and said that she is quite ok to look after the kids, and that everything is ok to book the trip. I really wish he would mind his own business and stop trying to control other people.
Anyway, on with the day.....lots to do!!
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Starting to feel in control!
For the first time in a long time, I actually feel as if Im getting things under control. I usually live in a total chaotic state. I constantly chase my tail...always behind in everything I do. I try like crazy to control, like a control freak does, but things always change so fast in this place.
This last week I have been renovating the kids' bathroom. Washing walls, windows, blinds, stripping back the mouldy sealant which was poorly done by our predecessors and made the bath and shower look gross, regrouting some bits, washing the lightfittings and fans. I also installed a dispenser for shampoo and conditioner on the wall. Shampoo and conditioner is a problem in this house as Stef loves putting it in her bath. Over the years I reckon she has wasted a thousand dollars of shampoo at least. Now how to figure out how to keep her from eating the kids' toothpaste...hmmm. Anyway, the bathroom is looking great now!~ just got a little more sealant to replace and a little regrouting and replace the tap washers and its finished. Second room down.....11 to go!! This week, its my bedroom....means finishing my vision board to so I can hang it up and put photos in the frames that Steve bought for my birthday. Its also time to get anything out of my room that just doesn't belong. Hanging out for a restful, peaceful room!
We went to visit Lydia and my beautiful new niece on Saturday night. Just gorgeous..a little doll. I'm sure she will be spoilt rotten.
oh and I'm in the process of giving up smoking again....wearing patches but still allowing myself to smoke until 1st April. Finding that I am enjoying them less and less, and smoking less each day and that I am happy that I am giving up again. I am so much more energetic when I don't smoke, suffer less anxiety and less depression...all pretty good reasons to give up, let alone the health stuff. I'm hoping to be through the worst of it before I go to Spain.
My passport arrived yesterday...now we just need to book my flights. I still can't quite believe its actually happening!!
Anyway, on with the day, have a lot planned...finishing off the kids bathroom, starting on my room and making sure all the washing is done as the weather is going to be beautiful.
Had a spa with Stef this morning as I couldnt bath her...she loves it and so do I. Its just so nice to start the day with relaxation.
This last week I have been renovating the kids' bathroom. Washing walls, windows, blinds, stripping back the mouldy sealant which was poorly done by our predecessors and made the bath and shower look gross, regrouting some bits, washing the lightfittings and fans. I also installed a dispenser for shampoo and conditioner on the wall. Shampoo and conditioner is a problem in this house as Stef loves putting it in her bath. Over the years I reckon she has wasted a thousand dollars of shampoo at least. Now how to figure out how to keep her from eating the kids' toothpaste...hmmm. Anyway, the bathroom is looking great now!~ just got a little more sealant to replace and a little regrouting and replace the tap washers and its finished. Second room down.....11 to go!! This week, its my bedroom....means finishing my vision board to so I can hang it up and put photos in the frames that Steve bought for my birthday. Its also time to get anything out of my room that just doesn't belong. Hanging out for a restful, peaceful room!
We went to visit Lydia and my beautiful new niece on Saturday night. Just gorgeous..a little doll. I'm sure she will be spoilt rotten.
oh and I'm in the process of giving up smoking again....wearing patches but still allowing myself to smoke until 1st April. Finding that I am enjoying them less and less, and smoking less each day and that I am happy that I am giving up again. I am so much more energetic when I don't smoke, suffer less anxiety and less depression...all pretty good reasons to give up, let alone the health stuff. I'm hoping to be through the worst of it before I go to Spain.
My passport arrived yesterday...now we just need to book my flights. I still can't quite believe its actually happening!!
Anyway, on with the day, have a lot planned...finishing off the kids bathroom, starting on my room and making sure all the washing is done as the weather is going to be beautiful.
Had a spa with Stef this morning as I couldnt bath her...she loves it and so do I. Its just so nice to start the day with relaxation.
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Getting teenagers out of bed!
Honestly, I think the kids need cattle prods, electric blankets that give shocks or waterproof rooms so that I can throw icy water over them. Getting these teenagers out of bed on time is like pulling teeth....lots of screaming, and pure torture most of the time. I know part of it is my fault..I crash out at 9pm, so the older kids basically put themselves to bed. Sometimes I'm sure they are still up a couple of hours after they are supposed to be in bed. Maybe a timer that switches off all computers at 10.30pm would be good. lol.
Stef had a party night..up at 3am, 4am and 5am for good.....grr....all the lights on, the tvs on very loud. She will be tired at school today. Must be a full moon!!
Its amazing how the moon has a bearing on these kids, especially Stef. She becomes quite aggitated and antsy at the full moon and I know that other parents of autistic kids find the same thing. One good thing has come of being up so early is the housework is getting done...lol...always look on the bright side of life :) This week I'm scrubbing out the kids bathroom. OMG, yesterday I did the windows and the blinds inside and out. It was gross! Probably the first time I have cleaned them since we moved in! Today its the shower...probably will strip the sealant and redo it, as it has become black in spots. I just want my house to look a lot cleaner than it is now...and its getting there...room by room. I just have to keep focussed on one room at a time until its done, while keeping the other rooms as neat as I can too. Tricky task in this place especially with the 4 little pigs lol.
Anyways, its the pointy time of the day....time to get the brats up!
Stef had a party night..up at 3am, 4am and 5am for good.....grr....all the lights on, the tvs on very loud. She will be tired at school today. Must be a full moon!!
Its amazing how the moon has a bearing on these kids, especially Stef. She becomes quite aggitated and antsy at the full moon and I know that other parents of autistic kids find the same thing. One good thing has come of being up so early is the housework is getting done...lol...always look on the bright side of life :) This week I'm scrubbing out the kids bathroom. OMG, yesterday I did the windows and the blinds inside and out. It was gross! Probably the first time I have cleaned them since we moved in! Today its the shower...probably will strip the sealant and redo it, as it has become black in spots. I just want my house to look a lot cleaner than it is now...and its getting there...room by room. I just have to keep focussed on one room at a time until its done, while keeping the other rooms as neat as I can too. Tricky task in this place especially with the 4 little pigs lol.
Anyways, its the pointy time of the day....time to get the brats up!
Monday, March 21, 2011
Getting there!
I always have one week a month where I just don't seem to cope as well as other times. Its amazing how hormones affect the way you cope and feel. I just plain felt overwhelmed and inundated by shit.
My big brother kept ringing at odd times of the day and night...1am, 3am....3 days in a row. Had Steve not been overseas I would have turned off my phone. I was just so sleep deprived by the end of the week. I know he was scared and alone having had an accident on his bike and then ending up in hospital with no feeling in his legs and a massive headache. Turns out it was just a bad concussion. Having no one over there to turn to, he rings here which I am glad he does, but hey, remember the time difference pal!
Hmmm, got a letter from the accountant..I didnt put a return in last year and the tax man is chasing it up. Must get on to it today!
On the good news front, we had confirmation that Stef will get her Ipad from the Adam Scott Foundation. It comes with an internet connection for 12 months and heaps of programs which help with education and speech facilitation. How awesome. Adam Scott is a professional golfer from Australia and on finding friends with autistic children were having such trouble to get the things they needed to help their children, set up a foundation for this purpose. Not many charities just do autism so its great that the need was recognised. I initially did not put in an application but sent Adam a letter saying how grateful I was as a mother that he had set up the foundation. He then forwarded it on to his organisation who put
Stef straight into the application process. The iPad should arrive either this week or next!
Another piece of good news is that Brent got his marks back on the first English SAC and had done very well, 22.5/30. The english teacher was very pleased and considering he handwrote this one, thats pretty good. We are working hard as a team to keep him on track. Emails and phonecalls between all of us. I can only hope that we keep him motivated for the rest of the year.
Anyway, on with cleaning.....the house is starting to look a lot better. Room by room. This week its the kids bathroom and bedrooms. Scrubbing walls, washing windows etc. Gotta love Flylady and Cozi for keeping me on track. I need it, being so ADHD I need all the tools I can get to keep on task.
My big brother kept ringing at odd times of the day and night...1am, 3am....3 days in a row. Had Steve not been overseas I would have turned off my phone. I was just so sleep deprived by the end of the week. I know he was scared and alone having had an accident on his bike and then ending up in hospital with no feeling in his legs and a massive headache. Turns out it was just a bad concussion. Having no one over there to turn to, he rings here which I am glad he does, but hey, remember the time difference pal!
Hmmm, got a letter from the accountant..I didnt put a return in last year and the tax man is chasing it up. Must get on to it today!
On the good news front, we had confirmation that Stef will get her Ipad from the Adam Scott Foundation. It comes with an internet connection for 12 months and heaps of programs which help with education and speech facilitation. How awesome. Adam Scott is a professional golfer from Australia and on finding friends with autistic children were having such trouble to get the things they needed to help their children, set up a foundation for this purpose. Not many charities just do autism so its great that the need was recognised. I initially did not put in an application but sent Adam a letter saying how grateful I was as a mother that he had set up the foundation. He then forwarded it on to his organisation who put
Stef straight into the application process. The iPad should arrive either this week or next!
Another piece of good news is that Brent got his marks back on the first English SAC and had done very well, 22.5/30. The english teacher was very pleased and considering he handwrote this one, thats pretty good. We are working hard as a team to keep him on track. Emails and phonecalls between all of us. I can only hope that we keep him motivated for the rest of the year.
Anyway, on with cleaning.....the house is starting to look a lot better. Room by room. This week its the kids bathroom and bedrooms. Scrubbing walls, washing windows etc. Gotta love Flylady and Cozi for keeping me on track. I need it, being so ADHD I need all the tools I can get to keep on task.
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Caravans, the long term
We went to the caravan show yesterday....OMG there are some beautiful caravans out there...all with showers, toilets the lot. Its where I realised though, that our life will never quite be like other peoples. We always have to plan to have a third wheel. Where other people can get a van with just a double bed, ours will need to have a bed for Stef, even when we are old and grey she will be with us. There is no major investment by the government in residential care for these kids coming through. It's scary, but I try not to focus on it..what will be will be.
Jack is relly focussing on the end of the Mayan Callendar.....poor kid thinks the world will end next year...and with all the natural disasters, its even harder to convince him that the world will go on...and that Australia is a very safe country. Sometimes the thought processes of these kids are set in stone and its very hard to get them to think otherwise. I just keep telling him that I plan on growing old with his dad and that I want to see grandchildren some day. His answer to that, "well mum, give up smoking". Truth out of the mouths of babes. Soon babe, real soon!
Steve is heading off to China again this morning..until Saturday. Im pretty used to it, business as usual in this place. Yes I miss him heaps when he is away, but life doesnt stop...things still need to be done and kids need to feel confident in Mum's ability to keep it all going. Got a pretty busy week ahead...especially Brent as he has two Assessment tasks this week. I need to keep the house calm and collected all week. I also have a couple of meetings with the schools and of course drum lessons for Jack. Always stuff to do.
Oh and Im getting the plans together for our trip...must get my passport photo today and send it all off. Now mum is home I can get Beverly's phone number so that I can call Peter in the UK. Hopefully Pete can give me a bed while I am there which will give me a bit more cash to spend over there. Saving hard...I just want to be able to do so much while I am there.
Anyway, its the pointy end of the day...time to get the kidlets organised!!
Jack is relly focussing on the end of the Mayan Callendar.....poor kid thinks the world will end next year...and with all the natural disasters, its even harder to convince him that the world will go on...and that Australia is a very safe country. Sometimes the thought processes of these kids are set in stone and its very hard to get them to think otherwise. I just keep telling him that I plan on growing old with his dad and that I want to see grandchildren some day. His answer to that, "well mum, give up smoking". Truth out of the mouths of babes. Soon babe, real soon!
Steve is heading off to China again this morning..until Saturday. Im pretty used to it, business as usual in this place. Yes I miss him heaps when he is away, but life doesnt stop...things still need to be done and kids need to feel confident in Mum's ability to keep it all going. Got a pretty busy week ahead...especially Brent as he has two Assessment tasks this week. I need to keep the house calm and collected all week. I also have a couple of meetings with the schools and of course drum lessons for Jack. Always stuff to do.
Oh and Im getting the plans together for our trip...must get my passport photo today and send it all off. Now mum is home I can get Beverly's phone number so that I can call Peter in the UK. Hopefully Pete can give me a bed while I am there which will give me a bit more cash to spend over there. Saving hard...I just want to be able to do so much while I am there.
Anyway, its the pointy end of the day...time to get the kidlets organised!!
Monday, March 14, 2011
Upper or a Downer
I hope my positiveness comes through my blog. I really am a very positive person most of the time. Yeah life gets tough, but hey, I manage and usually with a smile on my face. I always look towards other people who have even tougher lives and seem to manage to smile...they have my utmost respect and its something that I always hope to emulate.
I hope I am an uploader in peoples lives..someone they can draw strength from, someone who they see as being positive regardless of what I go through.
I realised that I have some terrific wonderful uplifting friends. Ones who when I look at them, or spend time with them I come away feeling happy and positive. I also have some friends who I find I am avoiding a lot.....they are downers...they download on me all the time and honestly make me feel like crap. I hope I'm not like that for anyone. I laugh a lotabout shit that happens, smile a lot at just little things and generally try to enjoy everything I do....even cleaning a toilet! How many other people can look at 5 inches of water up their hallway and run through it dancing and singing "I'm singing in the rain". Some people, when they hear about Stef say "I'm so sorry", I usually say, "I'm not......she is a very special girl and has taught me so much about life and most of all about myself and particularly unconditional love. I couldn't love her any more than I do already...she fills a very special place in my heart" I love all my kids just the same. They are all so special for different reasons. Brent for his resilience, Melinda for her strength and mental toughness, Stef for just being Stef, and Jack for his beautiful sense of humour.
This weekend has been one of catching up to washing....LOL, weeks since I saw the laundry floor last, but now its done!! Woohoo...I'm also doing a lot of little jobs at the moment....stuff that ordinarily gets overlooked. Its so nice to walk in my hallway...no finger prints on walls, no fly dirt on the cielings and the floor has been scrubbed, oh and my front porch has been done too....one room detailed so far. Kitchen this week.
I love flylady.net....It really makes a difference to how I view my housework...I call it homeblessing....its what I do to make our home blessed and full of love.
Anyway...making a conscious effort to be an upper not a downer. Today going to the caravan and camping show. I really want to see what I am really aiming for!!
I hope I am an uploader in peoples lives..someone they can draw strength from, someone who they see as being positive regardless of what I go through.
I realised that I have some terrific wonderful uplifting friends. Ones who when I look at them, or spend time with them I come away feeling happy and positive. I also have some friends who I find I am avoiding a lot.....they are downers...they download on me all the time and honestly make me feel like crap. I hope I'm not like that for anyone. I laugh a lotabout shit that happens, smile a lot at just little things and generally try to enjoy everything I do....even cleaning a toilet! How many other people can look at 5 inches of water up their hallway and run through it dancing and singing "I'm singing in the rain". Some people, when they hear about Stef say "I'm so sorry", I usually say, "I'm not......she is a very special girl and has taught me so much about life and most of all about myself and particularly unconditional love. I couldn't love her any more than I do already...she fills a very special place in my heart" I love all my kids just the same. They are all so special for different reasons. Brent for his resilience, Melinda for her strength and mental toughness, Stef for just being Stef, and Jack for his beautiful sense of humour.
This weekend has been one of catching up to washing....LOL, weeks since I saw the laundry floor last, but now its done!! Woohoo...I'm also doing a lot of little jobs at the moment....stuff that ordinarily gets overlooked. Its so nice to walk in my hallway...no finger prints on walls, no fly dirt on the cielings and the floor has been scrubbed, oh and my front porch has been done too....one room detailed so far. Kitchen this week.
I love flylady.net....It really makes a difference to how I view my housework...I call it homeblessing....its what I do to make our home blessed and full of love.
Anyway...making a conscious effort to be an upper not a downer. Today going to the caravan and camping show. I really want to see what I am really aiming for!!
Saturday, March 12, 2011
Friends
Was just thinking, this is probably the first time in my life that I have had more than one friend who truly understood me and the stuff we go through as a family.
I love it! Its great when you can have friends who when you say you have had a crap day they truly get what a crap day for you entails.
Yesterday was a good day...got up in the morning, Stef had run out of clothes after going through 4 changes a day for the week, there was no stuff for lunches in the cupboard because Stef had emptied it and it all just seemed too fricking hard. I ended up saying you know...I just cbfed and kept her home from school. I did heaps of washing but have still got heaps to do...its like that in this house...the record is 300kg of washing for the week....thats 30 10kg loads, I will come close to that this week! Stefs room is digusting. She got into the outside freezer and got into the icecreams...unfortunately I had just bought 3 packets..about 30 odd icecreams...lets just say her floor is a sticky nasty mess, its all over the walls and the bed. Yesterday I started on it....swept half of the room and got a full garbage bag of crap that was either wrecked, food that she had stolen out of the cupboards.....GROSSNESS! We really need a self locking door on the pantry....and a way to lock the freezer outside. I worked to a sweat for the majority of the day, but still when I look the house is messy.....grrrr.
Just planning out our trip to Spain...its going to be so awesome...3 days in barcelona (including cooking classes) 4 days (over a weekend in Ibiza -a party island) 3 in Valencia and 3 in another city....not quite sure of the name. I am so excited about it all. Just working on the details about child care. Looking at friends of the kids to farm them off to on weekends so that we can give my mum a break. Will ring one of the respite organisations to see if we can get Stef looked after by them maybe...or steves mum and dad. Im sure we will be able to work it all out somehow...we just have to. We will also get some housework help in everyday so that mum just doesnt do too much and can still do all the things that she does during the week. OMG I can't believe this is actually going to happen!!
Going to the camping and caravan show this weekend to drool over stuff that we just cant afford right now....still good to look though, you never know what is around your corner.
Just ate the nicest bacon and eggs....mmmmm.....free range eggs with bright golden yolks....I love my chookies!
Onwards....got shitloads to do!!
I love it! Its great when you can have friends who when you say you have had a crap day they truly get what a crap day for you entails.
Yesterday was a good day...got up in the morning, Stef had run out of clothes after going through 4 changes a day for the week, there was no stuff for lunches in the cupboard because Stef had emptied it and it all just seemed too fricking hard. I ended up saying you know...I just cbfed and kept her home from school. I did heaps of washing but have still got heaps to do...its like that in this house...the record is 300kg of washing for the week....thats 30 10kg loads, I will come close to that this week! Stefs room is digusting. She got into the outside freezer and got into the icecreams...unfortunately I had just bought 3 packets..about 30 odd icecreams...lets just say her floor is a sticky nasty mess, its all over the walls and the bed. Yesterday I started on it....swept half of the room and got a full garbage bag of crap that was either wrecked, food that she had stolen out of the cupboards.....GROSSNESS! We really need a self locking door on the pantry....and a way to lock the freezer outside. I worked to a sweat for the majority of the day, but still when I look the house is messy.....grrrr.
Just planning out our trip to Spain...its going to be so awesome...3 days in barcelona (including cooking classes) 4 days (over a weekend in Ibiza -a party island) 3 in Valencia and 3 in another city....not quite sure of the name. I am so excited about it all. Just working on the details about child care. Looking at friends of the kids to farm them off to on weekends so that we can give my mum a break. Will ring one of the respite organisations to see if we can get Stef looked after by them maybe...or steves mum and dad. Im sure we will be able to work it all out somehow...we just have to. We will also get some housework help in everyday so that mum just doesnt do too much and can still do all the things that she does during the week. OMG I can't believe this is actually going to happen!!
Going to the camping and caravan show this weekend to drool over stuff that we just cant afford right now....still good to look though, you never know what is around your corner.
Just ate the nicest bacon and eggs....mmmmm.....free range eggs with bright golden yolks....I love my chookies!
Onwards....got shitloads to do!!
Friday, March 11, 2011
Gotta love a long weekend every weekend!
I love working two days a week....I have a 5 day weekend every weekend....priceless.
Its been a crazy week...rushing around, school meetings and stuff.
Had the meeting with Lara Secondary yesterday. I think they actually get it now. I was cool, calm and collected and left them with the fact that the priorities they have are to ensure they actually spend the disability funding appropriately and that they have a moral and legal responsibility to the kids who are recipients of funding.
I beleive that the schools should be accountable to the parents and the education department on how they spend the individual funding packages of each special needs child. Brent has a funding package of over $20 000 which goes to the school....that would pay for an aide at least 40%....I can tell you, there is no way that an aide is with him even 10% of the time...maybe 2 hours a week and thats been for the last 3 years, so where is the rest of the money being spent???? Being level 3 funded, his grant shouldnt be pooled (level 1 &2 funds are pooled), but spent individually. We got the application together for the examination computer. The reports I put in it left no dout of getting it. The coordinator said..she gets why now. I said, hey, you make the decision very easy for the board to say yes, leave no doubt...make the decision an absolute no brainer and nothing goes wrong.
I have heaps of housework to do today......sometimes its so damned hard to keep up. I guess having a week where rushng around with meetings, leaves few waking hours spare to get stuff done. Lets just say that the washing machine is going already and will be going all day. Im even going into the rats nest of Brent's room....hmm, may need a snorkle and air tank for that...maybe a hazmat kit. I havent been in there a while, so I reckon there would be 6 or 7 loads of washing in there at least!
I had a fight with Brent and Melinda yesterday. I had already defrosted the meat for tea, and brent decided that he wasnt having that. I said, no mate, we cant waste what I have already defrosted, we cant throw out money like that. It descended into a yelling match, and then MJ decided to step in..it totally annoys me when she butts in all the time. It seems I can't tell Brent off for anything without her trying to step in to the argument. Im really working on her not doing this..to mind her own business. Eventually I made him understand that we live to a budget, and sometimes we dont always get to eat what we want. Hell, Id like to have fillet steak every night, but we cant afford to do that and have other stuff as well. Eventually he got it. Brent is very limited about what he eats...4 main courses, and the occasional sausage (which he eats but doesnt like) If he had his way it would be lasagne or spaghetti or buritos every single night. He will not try anything new, or eat anything which involves chewing. Boring!
Oh and Jetsetter (steve) is off to China on Monday again..haha....frequent flyer points are mounting up this year for sure. Fortunately next week is pretty easy at this stage no extra appointments and nothing else on the agenda. I try to make sure that when he is away life is much simpler.
Ok, next load of washing and time to get MJ up.
Its been a crazy week...rushing around, school meetings and stuff.
Had the meeting with Lara Secondary yesterday. I think they actually get it now. I was cool, calm and collected and left them with the fact that the priorities they have are to ensure they actually spend the disability funding appropriately and that they have a moral and legal responsibility to the kids who are recipients of funding.
I beleive that the schools should be accountable to the parents and the education department on how they spend the individual funding packages of each special needs child. Brent has a funding package of over $20 000 which goes to the school....that would pay for an aide at least 40%....I can tell you, there is no way that an aide is with him even 10% of the time...maybe 2 hours a week and thats been for the last 3 years, so where is the rest of the money being spent???? Being level 3 funded, his grant shouldnt be pooled (level 1 &2 funds are pooled), but spent individually. We got the application together for the examination computer. The reports I put in it left no dout of getting it. The coordinator said..she gets why now. I said, hey, you make the decision very easy for the board to say yes, leave no doubt...make the decision an absolute no brainer and nothing goes wrong.
I have heaps of housework to do today......sometimes its so damned hard to keep up. I guess having a week where rushng around with meetings, leaves few waking hours spare to get stuff done. Lets just say that the washing machine is going already and will be going all day. Im even going into the rats nest of Brent's room....hmm, may need a snorkle and air tank for that...maybe a hazmat kit. I havent been in there a while, so I reckon there would be 6 or 7 loads of washing in there at least!
I had a fight with Brent and Melinda yesterday. I had already defrosted the meat for tea, and brent decided that he wasnt having that. I said, no mate, we cant waste what I have already defrosted, we cant throw out money like that. It descended into a yelling match, and then MJ decided to step in..it totally annoys me when she butts in all the time. It seems I can't tell Brent off for anything without her trying to step in to the argument. Im really working on her not doing this..to mind her own business. Eventually I made him understand that we live to a budget, and sometimes we dont always get to eat what we want. Hell, Id like to have fillet steak every night, but we cant afford to do that and have other stuff as well. Eventually he got it. Brent is very limited about what he eats...4 main courses, and the occasional sausage (which he eats but doesnt like) If he had his way it would be lasagne or spaghetti or buritos every single night. He will not try anything new, or eat anything which involves chewing. Boring!
Oh and Jetsetter (steve) is off to China on Monday again..haha....frequent flyer points are mounting up this year for sure. Fortunately next week is pretty easy at this stage no extra appointments and nothing else on the agenda. I try to make sure that when he is away life is much simpler.
Ok, next load of washing and time to get MJ up.
Thursday, March 10, 2011
Time management
Sometimes I wish I had so much better time management skills....but then sometimes I suprise myself on just what can be done. Yesterday was one of those days, especially after school where I had 4 things that had to be done in under an hour, all at different locations. Picking up Stef, buying new school shoes for Brent, picking up a report from the paed and parent teacher interviews for Jack. With a little careful thought, I managed to do them all!
Life gets so busy in this place at times....crazily busy. I often wish there was two of me so I have a hope in hell of getting it together. At least I don't beat myself up on the stuff that doesnt get done any more. I used to be mercilessly critical of myself when I just couldnt be superwoman 24 hours a day. Now I just accept that I get done what I can, set my priorites and go with that. I am so much kinder to myself now. I am no longer a martyr.
Today I have a mediation meeting with Lara Secondary school about this whole application thing. I will stay carm but also very determined....float like a butterfly sting like a bee..but they better not cross me. I am a woman who will fight to the death for my kids....ruthless and pulling no punches and incompetence is my pet hate.
Anyway....onward...huge day....work, meetings and kid homework.
Life gets so busy in this place at times....crazily busy. I often wish there was two of me so I have a hope in hell of getting it together. At least I don't beat myself up on the stuff that doesnt get done any more. I used to be mercilessly critical of myself when I just couldnt be superwoman 24 hours a day. Now I just accept that I get done what I can, set my priorites and go with that. I am so much kinder to myself now. I am no longer a martyr.
Today I have a mediation meeting with Lara Secondary school about this whole application thing. I will stay carm but also very determined....float like a butterfly sting like a bee..but they better not cross me. I am a woman who will fight to the death for my kids....ruthless and pulling no punches and incompetence is my pet hate.
Anyway....onward...huge day....work, meetings and kid homework.
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
No regrets!
A little bit of gratefulness today for the things I have in life.
I live my life with no regrets. Yes I have been lucky to find a wonderful man and love in my life. Sometimes our life is tough, but together we get through and it never seems too hard. How lucky I am to have someone who loves me, supports me on my journey, encourages me to be the best I can be and has always respected me as a person. I know he would never hurt me physically or emotionally. Having him in my life gives a silver lining to any cloud. I'm not saying that we never have cross words, but arguments never descend to the personal degradation of each other. Basically we fight fair. I have never regretted one second of the last 22 years, even with the crazy roller coaster that autism has brought into our lives.
Starting to get it together with planning our trip to Spain..Oh its going to be a trip! Hopefully the details will all sort out smoothly. I'm looking at flying out on the 20th May to London, spending 4 days there, then heading to Barcelona for a few days and then driving down the coast of Spain with Steve maybe..still looking at that part. It will be an amazing trip.
One thing that losing friends has taught me in the last couple of months is that there are no guarantees..that we need to live today as a precious day for who knows what tomorrow brings.
Brent had his English SAC yesterday. I think he did all right....he really is amazing. Got the report from the OT specialist yesterday..she has put him at 1% on his handwriting speed....that means that 99% of his peers can write faster than he can. He has the writing ability under a 7 year old. Isnt it then amazing that he has reached VCE without any consideration by the school, no extra time on assessment tasks and no extra help taking notes. Isnt it amazing too that he has got marks easily at the top of his class, that he wrtoe enough to get the marks. His story is pretty inspirational.
Jack had his first Drumming lesson last night. I'm not sure how enthusiastic he is about it at this stage, but I think with a bit of time, and having a lovely young guy teaching him who is incredibly cool....I think he will grow to love it. The thing about being a drummer is that they can use the energy, constantly moving. Perfect for the ADHD kid!! He can really lay into the drums as hard as he likes...which hopefully will get rid of the agression.
Stef is a little frustrating at the moment. She will not leave her shoes on at all at the moment. I bought her new shoes last week, and already the back of them are wrecked..I really dont know what the solution is on this one.
Anyway, a busy day ahead...work and then Parent/Teacher interviews with Jacks Teacher.
I live my life with no regrets. Yes I have been lucky to find a wonderful man and love in my life. Sometimes our life is tough, but together we get through and it never seems too hard. How lucky I am to have someone who loves me, supports me on my journey, encourages me to be the best I can be and has always respected me as a person. I know he would never hurt me physically or emotionally. Having him in my life gives a silver lining to any cloud. I'm not saying that we never have cross words, but arguments never descend to the personal degradation of each other. Basically we fight fair. I have never regretted one second of the last 22 years, even with the crazy roller coaster that autism has brought into our lives.
Starting to get it together with planning our trip to Spain..Oh its going to be a trip! Hopefully the details will all sort out smoothly. I'm looking at flying out on the 20th May to London, spending 4 days there, then heading to Barcelona for a few days and then driving down the coast of Spain with Steve maybe..still looking at that part. It will be an amazing trip.
One thing that losing friends has taught me in the last couple of months is that there are no guarantees..that we need to live today as a precious day for who knows what tomorrow brings.
Brent had his English SAC yesterday. I think he did all right....he really is amazing. Got the report from the OT specialist yesterday..she has put him at 1% on his handwriting speed....that means that 99% of his peers can write faster than he can. He has the writing ability under a 7 year old. Isnt it then amazing that he has reached VCE without any consideration by the school, no extra time on assessment tasks and no extra help taking notes. Isnt it amazing too that he has got marks easily at the top of his class, that he wrtoe enough to get the marks. His story is pretty inspirational.
Jack had his first Drumming lesson last night. I'm not sure how enthusiastic he is about it at this stage, but I think with a bit of time, and having a lovely young guy teaching him who is incredibly cool....I think he will grow to love it. The thing about being a drummer is that they can use the energy, constantly moving. Perfect for the ADHD kid!! He can really lay into the drums as hard as he likes...which hopefully will get rid of the agression.
Stef is a little frustrating at the moment. She will not leave her shoes on at all at the moment. I bought her new shoes last week, and already the back of them are wrecked..I really dont know what the solution is on this one.
Anyway, a busy day ahead...work and then Parent/Teacher interviews with Jacks Teacher.
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
Sorting stuff out gradually
Going up to Melbourne this morning to get my marriage certificate for my passport...Im a little worried that it isnt even registered as my latest birth certificate that I got has no mention of a name change on the back. Would laugh if it turns out we arent even married legally. Hopefully I can get Brent's full birth certificate while I am up there. We really need to get him on to getting his learners.
Today Brent has his first VCE assessment task...an English SAC. He says he is prepared for it. At least for this one he can use a computer to write the essay...to prove to the education department that his work is a lot better if he is allowed. Oh and he helped Melinda with her English essay the other night while we were out. She was pleased as she ended up getting a good result.
Took Jack and Stef to the pool yesterday...it really hasnt been a good summer for swimming. I just hope we get a few more hot days. Lara has a great pool...the best out door pool in Geelong by a long way..we are so lucky.
Having trouble keeping up to the washing in this place..sore shoulder so I avoid it like the plague at the moment...but the kids need clean clothes, so I still have to do it. Bit by bit Im getting the house cleaner too.....oh it just seemed that everwhere I looked there was just grot. It is reasonably tidy, just I dont usually find time for all the little things...like the walls, cobwebs, grout, etc. Having Stef in the house is like having 100 2 year olds...honestly...except the finger prints on the walls reach from 2foot up the wall to 6 foot....bloody nutella is hard to get off too.
Going to have someone clean the house while I am away to make it easier for Mum and whoever else looks after the kids. Its a big job.
Today Brent has his first VCE assessment task...an English SAC. He says he is prepared for it. At least for this one he can use a computer to write the essay...to prove to the education department that his work is a lot better if he is allowed. Oh and he helped Melinda with her English essay the other night while we were out. She was pleased as she ended up getting a good result.
Took Jack and Stef to the pool yesterday...it really hasnt been a good summer for swimming. I just hope we get a few more hot days. Lara has a great pool...the best out door pool in Geelong by a long way..we are so lucky.
Having trouble keeping up to the washing in this place..sore shoulder so I avoid it like the plague at the moment...but the kids need clean clothes, so I still have to do it. Bit by bit Im getting the house cleaner too.....oh it just seemed that everwhere I looked there was just grot. It is reasonably tidy, just I dont usually find time for all the little things...like the walls, cobwebs, grout, etc. Having Stef in the house is like having 100 2 year olds...honestly...except the finger prints on the walls reach from 2foot up the wall to 6 foot....bloody nutella is hard to get off too.
Going to have someone clean the house while I am away to make it easier for Mum and whoever else looks after the kids. Its a big job.
Monday, March 7, 2011
A good weekend!
We had a great weekend! We decided that the older kids were responsible enough to leave babysitting the other kids at night. We had left them during the day often enough, but at 17 and almost 15, we decided they really can look after the other two pretty well. Stef is becoming much easier to care for as she doesnt wander at all now and will put herself to bed.
Autism has really isolated us over the years. Its hard to take an autistic child into someone elses home. Stef is really good at getting into stuff...can find toothpaste no matter where you put it and is just a destructive force of one. We have found that we just havent had the time to nurture our friendships either. Its kindof sad really...some friends have just gone by the wayside. The other thing we find is we have very separate friendship groups. I have my friends, Steve has his, and we really dont get to amalgamate them. We went to a housewarming party on Friday night of a guy steve knows from basketball. I think I had met him once...maybe. It was fun. We also went out last night for a while to visit another friend. Its time to put more back into other people....to nurture friendships and build our friendship group. You can't expect people to be around in the bad times if you have never had the good times with them.
Steve cooked an amazing seafood paella on Saturday night..it was so nice! He really is a great cook! We both like cooking. We are going to get together a group of friends to have regular dinner parties. I think its a great idea especially as all of the girls are foodies, love cooking and love to entertain. Its also a way for us all to expand our friendship groups.
Oh asnd the trip to spain and england is coming together.....now to find some carers for the kids. Going to births, deaths and marriages today as I realise we have never had a marriage certificate. Got the one you get from the church of course, but never the proper one...hopefully we are registered lol as there are no changes of name listed on my birth certificate. I was searching prices of fares yesterday and realised that it is the same price to go via London.....so I am going to have a stopover for 3 nights I think. I have a cousin over there that I would love to catch up to...he is 18 months older than me. He is pretty centrally located (has a house on the Thames), and I think I may be able to stay there...what it means is knocking off two of my bucket list items on one hit. I dont know if other people have bucket lists, but its something I have had for a while. I would hate to get to the end with regrets...I think losing some friends to cancer lately has prompted me to not delay doing the things I really want to do and see any longer....you never know whats around your corner. Oh and will definitely get travel insurance I think.
Anyway, a busy week ahead....only working my two days this week. I dont want to make a habit of overtime...if I wanted to work full time, id have a full time job. Everywhere I look in the house is grossness...marks on walls, grotty windows, grout on the floor is gross and not to mention the sealant in the showers. One bit at a time it will improve. Brent has his first SAC to do on Tuesday. An in class essay for English. He said he has prepared for it...fingers crossed. Oh and I have Jacks Parent teacher interviews too I think.
Autism has really isolated us over the years. Its hard to take an autistic child into someone elses home. Stef is really good at getting into stuff...can find toothpaste no matter where you put it and is just a destructive force of one. We have found that we just havent had the time to nurture our friendships either. Its kindof sad really...some friends have just gone by the wayside. The other thing we find is we have very separate friendship groups. I have my friends, Steve has his, and we really dont get to amalgamate them. We went to a housewarming party on Friday night of a guy steve knows from basketball. I think I had met him once...maybe. It was fun. We also went out last night for a while to visit another friend. Its time to put more back into other people....to nurture friendships and build our friendship group. You can't expect people to be around in the bad times if you have never had the good times with them.
Steve cooked an amazing seafood paella on Saturday night..it was so nice! He really is a great cook! We both like cooking. We are going to get together a group of friends to have regular dinner parties. I think its a great idea especially as all of the girls are foodies, love cooking and love to entertain. Its also a way for us all to expand our friendship groups.
Oh asnd the trip to spain and england is coming together.....now to find some carers for the kids. Going to births, deaths and marriages today as I realise we have never had a marriage certificate. Got the one you get from the church of course, but never the proper one...hopefully we are registered lol as there are no changes of name listed on my birth certificate. I was searching prices of fares yesterday and realised that it is the same price to go via London.....so I am going to have a stopover for 3 nights I think. I have a cousin over there that I would love to catch up to...he is 18 months older than me. He is pretty centrally located (has a house on the Thames), and I think I may be able to stay there...what it means is knocking off two of my bucket list items on one hit. I dont know if other people have bucket lists, but its something I have had for a while. I would hate to get to the end with regrets...I think losing some friends to cancer lately has prompted me to not delay doing the things I really want to do and see any longer....you never know whats around your corner. Oh and will definitely get travel insurance I think.
Anyway, a busy week ahead....only working my two days this week. I dont want to make a habit of overtime...if I wanted to work full time, id have a full time job. Everywhere I look in the house is grossness...marks on walls, grotty windows, grout on the floor is gross and not to mention the sealant in the showers. One bit at a time it will improve. Brent has his first SAC to do on Tuesday. An in class essay for English. He said he has prepared for it...fingers crossed. Oh and I have Jacks Parent teacher interviews too I think.
Friday, March 4, 2011
OT visit and Stress out!
Well, Brent got to his OT appointment. She was wonderful, helpful to the extreme! Brent tested out to have the dexterity of a 7 year old, little physical strength in his fingers, he fatigues very easily and has the writing ability of a six year 8 month old! She said he has a significant physical disability. Ah, makes a lot of sense. It also amazes me as Brent has managed to get this far with his school work with this affliction with little help. He is a star! What a journey we have had with him! I could really write a book about it. It really is quite a miraculous story. Anyway, I got the report back to the school yesterday afternoon. My bit in all that is done and somehow I pulled it off.
Yesterday was just a major stress out. Between trying to organise work around the appointment (thank goodness for great terrific, wonderful bosses!) and then having the primary school ring at 4pm, to say that Jack was still there..and the bus rang to say no one was there to pick up Stef....Omg....I had to leave work in a hurry to pick them up.(I had organised my mum, but crossed wires, and so she didnt pick them up, my fault) Lets just say it was the day from hell that I just want to forget. Going in to work today to catch up on all the stuff I didnt get finished yesterday and to tidy up a heap of loose ends.
Its not very often I feel the stress of my life, but yesterday was just a major stress out day, by the end of it, I had wooshing in my head, a sore neck and just felt overwhelmed...feeling a lot better this morning though, amazing what a good nights sleep does. I have written out a list of stuff I need to get done at work, the Brent stuff is finished with, and now its just the catchup around the house which has got out of control. I just have to be a little kinder to myself today...none of this was my making, I just have to roll with it and work to get it back to organised.
Oh and Ive made complaints all over the place about Lara Secondary Schools disorganised disability coordination. I want them to realise just what affect their hopelessness has on the families and the children. Can you believe that when I was talking to the vice principal about it and the long term consequences to Brent if he doesnt get this help, she said....oh he can always repeat VCE.....STUPID COW!! He shouldnt need to...not if he is granted this help. I just couldnt get over the attitude that this shit wouldnt affect him long term. Stupid woman.....he doesnt want to waste a year of his life.....not even a minute. GRRR. I tell you, I hit the roof at that..these people really dont have any idea the struggle we have had and continue to have!
The Occupational Therapist will see Jack next. There is a lot she can do to help him along the way with his hand coordination and handwriting. We get it pretty cheaply....I think $15 a session after we take out the government autism initiative. I will make an appointment for him on Monday. She is an OT who specialises in autism treatment.
Anyway must get moving..I think a spa this morning..
Yesterday was just a major stress out. Between trying to organise work around the appointment (thank goodness for great terrific, wonderful bosses!) and then having the primary school ring at 4pm, to say that Jack was still there..and the bus rang to say no one was there to pick up Stef....Omg....I had to leave work in a hurry to pick them up.(I had organised my mum, but crossed wires, and so she didnt pick them up, my fault) Lets just say it was the day from hell that I just want to forget. Going in to work today to catch up on all the stuff I didnt get finished yesterday and to tidy up a heap of loose ends.
Its not very often I feel the stress of my life, but yesterday was just a major stress out day, by the end of it, I had wooshing in my head, a sore neck and just felt overwhelmed...feeling a lot better this morning though, amazing what a good nights sleep does. I have written out a list of stuff I need to get done at work, the Brent stuff is finished with, and now its just the catchup around the house which has got out of control. I just have to be a little kinder to myself today...none of this was my making, I just have to roll with it and work to get it back to organised.
Oh and Ive made complaints all over the place about Lara Secondary Schools disorganised disability coordination. I want them to realise just what affect their hopelessness has on the families and the children. Can you believe that when I was talking to the vice principal about it and the long term consequences to Brent if he doesnt get this help, she said....oh he can always repeat VCE.....STUPID COW!! He shouldnt need to...not if he is granted this help. I just couldnt get over the attitude that this shit wouldnt affect him long term. Stupid woman.....he doesnt want to waste a year of his life.....not even a minute. GRRR. I tell you, I hit the roof at that..these people really dont have any idea the struggle we have had and continue to have!
The Occupational Therapist will see Jack next. There is a lot she can do to help him along the way with his hand coordination and handwriting. We get it pretty cheaply....I think $15 a session after we take out the government autism initiative. I will make an appointment for him on Monday. She is an OT who specialises in autism treatment.
Anyway must get moving..I think a spa this morning..
Thursday, March 3, 2011
the saga goes on!
Honestly, sometimes my life is just pure SAGA through no fault of my own.
I could physically strangle the disability coordinator at Lara Secondary School. The stupid fat cow couldnt organise a root in a brothel...HONESTLY! Whenever I went to the school last year I asked for the application process to be started for Brent to use a computer for his VCE exams and asked what we would need to do to get it. Brent has the handwriting ability of about a grade 1 child. He physically can't do it. He has major issues with the strength in his fingers and the coordination of his hand to his brain and fatigue in his arm. He cannot even click his fingers, open jars or move his fingers independently. The problem with exams and handwriting is that in order to get his writing even close to legible he has to concentrate so hard that he forgets about what he is writing. His work ends up a lot poorer. If he can use a keyboard, he can be an A grade student....handwriting, he ends up having work ability of about an E or an F. Well, we finally got the application form on Friday...or Brent did and he gave it to me YESTERDAY. Its due in on FRIDAY in Melbourne by mail! Ok, that leaves me 2 workings days to get a paediatric report, an OT report detailing his inability to write and an IQ assessment and get it to Melbourne. Great! considering waiting lists for the paediatritian is 5 months for an appointment even let alone an IQ test!! I rang the paed, and because I have known him since Brent was born and have been on committees with him, he has said he will sign a report if I write most of it. Last night I rang 15 OTs between 5.30 and 6pm...finally I got one to listen, and she has slotted an appointment in for him today..I basically bribed my way in...told her we would be paying cash, and begged her for the appointment, almost crying. Great, Im supposed to be working tomorrow!!! The IQ test just isnt possible.
Does this bloody school take any responsibility for this....No, well, I am putting in a complaint to all and sundry...the education department, the disability section of the education department, the regional disability coordinator, the regional education department head, the principal and the stupid fat cow. If that gets me no response, I will be taking it to the disability advocate as well. This school has been hopeless in regards to disability. I feel basically that for 6 years they have used Brent's level 3 funding for everything but helping BRENT! I asked for psg meeting with all his teachers....what did I get....the year coordinator...who doesnt even teach him.
This has been so stressful......its such an important application....and should have been given the attention that it deserved. If Brent gets knocked back on this, it will affect his long term future....and that just isn't fair. I definitely will be taking this shit as far as I can. Its been stressful, and perhaps another mother wouldnt have been able to pull it off....another child would miss out, simply because of inaction by the school, the lack of attention to detail, and the blase manner they treat disability.....tell you, they will be lucky if I dont take it to the disability advocate...IM SO PISSED OFF, ANGRY and STRESSED.
This week has been a nightmare!
I could physically strangle the disability coordinator at Lara Secondary School. The stupid fat cow couldnt organise a root in a brothel...HONESTLY! Whenever I went to the school last year I asked for the application process to be started for Brent to use a computer for his VCE exams and asked what we would need to do to get it. Brent has the handwriting ability of about a grade 1 child. He physically can't do it. He has major issues with the strength in his fingers and the coordination of his hand to his brain and fatigue in his arm. He cannot even click his fingers, open jars or move his fingers independently. The problem with exams and handwriting is that in order to get his writing even close to legible he has to concentrate so hard that he forgets about what he is writing. His work ends up a lot poorer. If he can use a keyboard, he can be an A grade student....handwriting, he ends up having work ability of about an E or an F. Well, we finally got the application form on Friday...or Brent did and he gave it to me YESTERDAY. Its due in on FRIDAY in Melbourne by mail! Ok, that leaves me 2 workings days to get a paediatric report, an OT report detailing his inability to write and an IQ assessment and get it to Melbourne. Great! considering waiting lists for the paediatritian is 5 months for an appointment even let alone an IQ test!! I rang the paed, and because I have known him since Brent was born and have been on committees with him, he has said he will sign a report if I write most of it. Last night I rang 15 OTs between 5.30 and 6pm...finally I got one to listen, and she has slotted an appointment in for him today..I basically bribed my way in...told her we would be paying cash, and begged her for the appointment, almost crying. Great, Im supposed to be working tomorrow!!! The IQ test just isnt possible.
Does this bloody school take any responsibility for this....No, well, I am putting in a complaint to all and sundry...the education department, the disability section of the education department, the regional disability coordinator, the regional education department head, the principal and the stupid fat cow. If that gets me no response, I will be taking it to the disability advocate as well. This school has been hopeless in regards to disability. I feel basically that for 6 years they have used Brent's level 3 funding for everything but helping BRENT! I asked for psg meeting with all his teachers....what did I get....the year coordinator...who doesnt even teach him.
This has been so stressful......its such an important application....and should have been given the attention that it deserved. If Brent gets knocked back on this, it will affect his long term future....and that just isn't fair. I definitely will be taking this shit as far as I can. Its been stressful, and perhaps another mother wouldnt have been able to pull it off....another child would miss out, simply because of inaction by the school, the lack of attention to detail, and the blase manner they treat disability.....tell you, they will be lucky if I dont take it to the disability advocate...IM SO PISSED OFF, ANGRY and STRESSED.
This week has been a nightmare!
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
A win!
Had the meeting at Barwon Valley School yesterday regarding Stef. I went in armed...with her work from last year, photos of journeys we make, and other stuff related to her abilities. The teacher didnt even know she could write her own name. Can't believe how little was passed on to her from the teacher last year. GRRR. Anyway, she went in with her list of goals, and I went in with mine...lets just say that all her goals were changed to include far more academic work and progression with speech. I also requested that Stef's netbook be sent home each night so that she can use it more for speech facilitation and that she be reassessed for an equipments grant to get more software. For a special school, they really are hopeless. More a child minding centre and I told them so...its a school for crying out loud!! When Stef got off the bus last night, I said to her, ha kid, now you are going to have to do work instead of play at school, and the little shit laughed at me. She knows that she has been slacking off and pretending not to be able to do stuff that she can easily do, simply because she has been put in a class with all non-verbal kids with extremely low iqs she has been expected to do absolutely nothing. Anyway, upshot is, more homework, more work at school on reading, writing, saying and word recognition...more work with maths and writing numbers. The stupid teacher said, oh I dont know how we will find time.....I said, well, are you a teacher or a child minder..this is a SCHOOL!! When I looked at their timetable, it was ridiculous.....less than 30 minutes a day spent on actual work...grr, seems as If I want this kid to learn, I am going to have to fight for it, and do a lot at home. The teacher also asked for a lot of my recipes and if I had some that didnt require mix masters in order to cook. I emailed her a heap, and then she asked if I could help teach some of the older kids one morning a week. I have to get a police check of course.
Cracking down on Melinda this week....piss poor excuses why she can't do homework...oh i left my book at school. Well, as from today, it isnt going to wash....No homework, no computer!!Same goes for Jack......no homework ..no computer!
Brent on the other hand is doing much better this week. He really is beginning to get it..came home last night and hit the books for a couple of hours as soon as he got home! His aide is working much harder and making sure he keeps in touch with me. I also need to make sure that I meet the teachers once a month, just to make sure.
Today is work...very busy there...time will fly!
Always heaps to do, never enough time to do it all....but I try!!
Cracking down on Melinda this week....piss poor excuses why she can't do homework...oh i left my book at school. Well, as from today, it isnt going to wash....No homework, no computer!!Same goes for Jack......no homework ..no computer!
Brent on the other hand is doing much better this week. He really is beginning to get it..came home last night and hit the books for a couple of hours as soon as he got home! His aide is working much harder and making sure he keeps in touch with me. I also need to make sure that I meet the teachers once a month, just to make sure.
Today is work...very busy there...time will fly!
Always heaps to do, never enough time to do it all....but I try!!
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Appreciation of good food
Somebody said to me yesterday, that my kids are so lucky to have good home cooked and natural food. It struck me. My kids are foodies. Last night I cooked San Choy Bow..a favourite in this house. Usually I buy a kit, but last night made it from scratch. Jack piped up, this is yummy mum, even better than usual..not knowing that I made it differently at all, yet picked up on the difference.
My kids get home made biscuits and muffins in their lunchboxes...and the teachers comment on it. Both of us (Steven and I) can cook up a batch of biscuits in minutes, so I wonder why people just dont do it. This morning, it was a batch of chocolate muffins....made in less than 5 minutes..in the oven and ready to eat. Are we as people losing the art of cooking for ourselves.....do we rely on packet mixes, on pre made stuff. Who is teaching those coming after us? Last year in home ec, Melinda's class made pasta...out of a packet..Melinda pipes up....this isnt home made..its packet shit. She loves home made....and my kids wont even eat packet gnocci.... Its so much cheaper to make from scratch.
Anyway.....meeting today at Barwon Valley school about Stef. Hopefully I can impress on them the importance of treating her as a young adult, to have higher expectations of what she can do and that its the lack of communication that is the problem, not the lack of IQ. Have found evidence of her abilities and will present that to them.
After that a daughterly visit to my mum....being good lately, catching up at least once a week!
My kids get home made biscuits and muffins in their lunchboxes...and the teachers comment on it. Both of us (Steven and I) can cook up a batch of biscuits in minutes, so I wonder why people just dont do it. This morning, it was a batch of chocolate muffins....made in less than 5 minutes..in the oven and ready to eat. Are we as people losing the art of cooking for ourselves.....do we rely on packet mixes, on pre made stuff. Who is teaching those coming after us? Last year in home ec, Melinda's class made pasta...out of a packet..Melinda pipes up....this isnt home made..its packet shit. She loves home made....and my kids wont even eat packet gnocci.... Its so much cheaper to make from scratch.
Anyway.....meeting today at Barwon Valley school about Stef. Hopefully I can impress on them the importance of treating her as a young adult, to have higher expectations of what she can do and that its the lack of communication that is the problem, not the lack of IQ. Have found evidence of her abilities and will present that to them.
After that a daughterly visit to my mum....being good lately, catching up at least once a week!
Monday, February 28, 2011
Busy week ahead!
I have a huge week ahead Have to go to work today...I hate not having everything up to date and totally organised. Today I plan to get the superannuation stuff completely up to date.
The house needs a bit of work after being left in the hands of two teenagers...tyhey just dont put a dish even on the bench, let alone in the dishwasher. I also need to finish off my vision board...
We have had two elderly family friends pass away. Steve's next door neighbour from where he grew up passed away from a heart attack but also had alzheimers. My next door neighbour from when we first came to geelong also passed away from Breast cancer. I could be a professional funeral goer, but alas, I can't spare the time from work this week so unless they are on Friday, I just can't go. I hate funerals anyway.
I have PSG meetings this week too....Stephanies one will be a little difficult. I really need to impress on the school that Stephanie is far more capable than they think and she needs to be expected to be able to do things. It frustrates me how they treat her as a baby instead of as a young woman. I am gathering all the work that she did last year and some video of her doing things at home.
Anyway, on with the week....
The house needs a bit of work after being left in the hands of two teenagers...tyhey just dont put a dish even on the bench, let alone in the dishwasher. I also need to finish off my vision board...
We have had two elderly family friends pass away. Steve's next door neighbour from where he grew up passed away from a heart attack but also had alzheimers. My next door neighbour from when we first came to geelong also passed away from Breast cancer. I could be a professional funeral goer, but alas, I can't spare the time from work this week so unless they are on Friday, I just can't go. I hate funerals anyway.
I have PSG meetings this week too....Stephanies one will be a little difficult. I really need to impress on the school that Stephanie is far more capable than they think and she needs to be expected to be able to do things. It frustrates me how they treat her as a baby instead of as a young woman. I am gathering all the work that she did last year and some video of her doing things at home.
Anyway, on with the week....
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Weekend!
We had a good one....not without some issues, but hey, thats expected with an autistic child like Stef.
Stef has a huge phobia of public toilets......you cannot get her in one for love nor money, not even chocolate! Anyways, we got to the motel room after our 4 hour drive, got ready to go to the festival, and thinking it would be a while before she could go, asked her to go to the toilet in the motel room. Do you think we could get her in there........NO WAY! I ended up putting a nappy on her (which she hates) and off we went. The festival was good fun...the music this year was an Elvis impersonator, (not particularly my cup of tea) and then Hot Pink..she was good. Stef totally enjoyed that bit..moshing away....she really loves music, and likes Pink as I have her albums. We got back to the hotel room, put a new nappy on her and put her to bed, we didnt even try to get her in the toilet. When we got up and was close to getting ready to leave.....she just marched in and went...woohoo, the fact that she overcame her fear was just awesome. We think she also went in there in the night as she was dry when she got up. Sometimes we just cant think why these things terrify her so much. We know that something happened at school one day, as her behaviour completely changed over night. Maybe she was locked in one.....hopefully nothing more than that, but without a voice, how can she ever tell us what went on.
We also picked up a heap of our stuff from our friends' place. Someone bought our huge old van which was stored down there..and the entire contents was emptied into their garage. A full trailer load of stuff, and still we left things down there that just didnt fit. We will buy a new van for next year's holidays. Oh and we had a blowout on the trailer on the way home......um more like a catestrophic failure of an extremely old worn out tyre.
Got home around 5, and Ive made a batch of biscuits for school lunches and a quiche for Steve and my lunches...gotta love our chookies!!!
Stef has a huge phobia of public toilets......you cannot get her in one for love nor money, not even chocolate! Anyways, we got to the motel room after our 4 hour drive, got ready to go to the festival, and thinking it would be a while before she could go, asked her to go to the toilet in the motel room. Do you think we could get her in there........NO WAY! I ended up putting a nappy on her (which she hates) and off we went. The festival was good fun...the music this year was an Elvis impersonator, (not particularly my cup of tea) and then Hot Pink..she was good. Stef totally enjoyed that bit..moshing away....she really loves music, and likes Pink as I have her albums. We got back to the hotel room, put a new nappy on her and put her to bed, we didnt even try to get her in the toilet. When we got up and was close to getting ready to leave.....she just marched in and went...woohoo, the fact that she overcame her fear was just awesome. We think she also went in there in the night as she was dry when she got up. Sometimes we just cant think why these things terrify her so much. We know that something happened at school one day, as her behaviour completely changed over night. Maybe she was locked in one.....hopefully nothing more than that, but without a voice, how can she ever tell us what went on.
We also picked up a heap of our stuff from our friends' place. Someone bought our huge old van which was stored down there..and the entire contents was emptied into their garage. A full trailer load of stuff, and still we left things down there that just didnt fit. We will buy a new van for next year's holidays. Oh and we had a blowout on the trailer on the way home......um more like a catestrophic failure of an extremely old worn out tyre.
Got home around 5, and Ive made a batch of biscuits for school lunches and a quiche for Steve and my lunches...gotta love our chookies!!!
Friday, February 25, 2011
Such a busy day yesterday
I was so busy at work yesterday...didnt get it all done which was disappointing but I knew that was the case anyway. Going in today to finish and catch up. I hate leaving unfinished business and mess. I really am a perfectionist in disguise.
I have a huge amount of washing to get done. Trying to put myself in a better position for next week than I was this week. This week was crazy....constantly having to check that the kids had clean clothes to wear the next day. Total chaos rules.
This weekend we have to go down to Heywood...to pick up the contents of our caravan from a friends' shed and there is a festival down there. Wood Wine and Roses. We went last year, but it was in better circumstances as this friends marriage has crumbled since. Stef will love the music and I'll have a couple of wines and relax anyway.
Its so nice to not have any ongoing commitments on weekends now. Means that we relax as a family more and more likely to do stuff on a Sunday together.
Im really getting on to an organisation site now, cozicentral.com.......its great. It has a calendar which I can assign to each member of the family, even able to put Brent's schoolwork tasks in so that I know what he should be up to by the end of each week. Oh and it has lists......so instead of writing it down, I just type it in and cross it off....perfect for the ADHD me. I just wish that I could use it as it is in the states...there it connects to the mobile....you can send the grocery list to your phone via sms.
Anyway, off to hang out my second load of washing for the morning....and its not even 6.30am.
JUST KEEP SWIMMING, JUST KEEP SWIMMING, JUST KEEP SWIMMING!!
I have a huge amount of washing to get done. Trying to put myself in a better position for next week than I was this week. This week was crazy....constantly having to check that the kids had clean clothes to wear the next day. Total chaos rules.
This weekend we have to go down to Heywood...to pick up the contents of our caravan from a friends' shed and there is a festival down there. Wood Wine and Roses. We went last year, but it was in better circumstances as this friends marriage has crumbled since. Stef will love the music and I'll have a couple of wines and relax anyway.
Its so nice to not have any ongoing commitments on weekends now. Means that we relax as a family more and more likely to do stuff on a Sunday together.
Im really getting on to an organisation site now, cozicentral.com.......its great. It has a calendar which I can assign to each member of the family, even able to put Brent's schoolwork tasks in so that I know what he should be up to by the end of each week. Oh and it has lists......so instead of writing it down, I just type it in and cross it off....perfect for the ADHD me. I just wish that I could use it as it is in the states...there it connects to the mobile....you can send the grocery list to your phone via sms.
Anyway, off to hang out my second load of washing for the morning....and its not even 6.30am.
JUST KEEP SWIMMING, JUST KEEP SWIMMING, JUST KEEP SWIMMING!!
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Organisation!
OMG what I would give to be an organisational guru! Sometimes I am just hopeless, get over it!! I am so organised at work, its sickening....everything in its place, nothing left undone and so so organised. It's hard to believe I am the same person sometimes. I just wish I could transport that person into all the aspects of my life. I'm trying! I am finding a site cozicentral.com really useful. It gives me a great calender which I can put all the members of the family in and sends the weekly list to my email each week, to do lists, shopping lists etc. I am putting all Brent's SACs into it, so I am reminded where and what he should be doing.
Had a phonecall from Brent's school yesterday. They want an IQ assessment and specialists report so that we can get him computer access for exams. Ouch, thats difficult because he has not seen a doctor since 2001. After Stef was diagnosed, we found that the specialists really didnt have the answers, but were guessing. Stupid Psychologist said that what we were doing with Brent (we did the Sonrise program before it was a program) was going to give him major anxieties....well, he was so so wrong. We gradually exposed Brent to the things that used to give him anxieties more and more. Eventually he overcame them all. He is also very independent and able to catch public transport, be in crowds etc. But beauty is, Stef also was exposed to these things, and for a severely autistic child can cope with so much, like going to the Melbourne CBD, catching public transport, being in noisy places with lots of sensory inputs. She is a star. But hey, the doctors don't know everything about how the brain works. They make generalisations based on populations.....but every single autistic person is different...not one is the same, so don't generalise, do what is right for each person. the doctor is filling out the form for me as he remembers Brent (just) and will go by my recommendations and explanations of behaviours, muscle control etc. Hopefully it will be enough. Brent will fly in exams if he is allowed to type rather than handwrite. It takes so much concentration to write neatly that he really can't remember what he is writing and the next sentence. His writing is barely legible and any marker will struggle to understand it without decreasing his marks just for neatness. So unfair if this is the case as he is a highly articulate, clever boy if they can see past his prep level handwriting.
I have PSG meeting for Stef on Tuesday, so I am going through her past work from last year to work out what the best goals would be for her. Speech and speech facilitation will be a big one, as well as computer usage, personal hygiene etc. I am going into this one with very clear thoughts on how we can get the best possible outcome for her and will be pushing up the expectations of the school.
Getting the kids into a better routine of doing homework straight after school...even Brent is catching up. I do believe they are actually starting to get it.
Oh and I asked the boss for the time off I need for Spain...explained what I wanted to do....no dramas there...he thinks its great that I am planning to do something that is on my wishlist in life.
We had a huge conversation in lunch yesterday about the mundane shit that people complain about especially women at the school gate. Michael said something really interesting in that I just don't complain. I see complaining as a totally useless exercise.....it just doesnt help me or the kids. I'm also a very practical person.....change nothing and nothing changes is my motto....if I'm not happy, its really up to me to make the changes necessary. I also don't panic that much.
Anyway, on with my busy day....its going to be huge!
Had a phonecall from Brent's school yesterday. They want an IQ assessment and specialists report so that we can get him computer access for exams. Ouch, thats difficult because he has not seen a doctor since 2001. After Stef was diagnosed, we found that the specialists really didnt have the answers, but were guessing. Stupid Psychologist said that what we were doing with Brent (we did the Sonrise program before it was a program) was going to give him major anxieties....well, he was so so wrong. We gradually exposed Brent to the things that used to give him anxieties more and more. Eventually he overcame them all. He is also very independent and able to catch public transport, be in crowds etc. But beauty is, Stef also was exposed to these things, and for a severely autistic child can cope with so much, like going to the Melbourne CBD, catching public transport, being in noisy places with lots of sensory inputs. She is a star. But hey, the doctors don't know everything about how the brain works. They make generalisations based on populations.....but every single autistic person is different...not one is the same, so don't generalise, do what is right for each person. the doctor is filling out the form for me as he remembers Brent (just) and will go by my recommendations and explanations of behaviours, muscle control etc. Hopefully it will be enough. Brent will fly in exams if he is allowed to type rather than handwrite. It takes so much concentration to write neatly that he really can't remember what he is writing and the next sentence. His writing is barely legible and any marker will struggle to understand it without decreasing his marks just for neatness. So unfair if this is the case as he is a highly articulate, clever boy if they can see past his prep level handwriting.
I have PSG meeting for Stef on Tuesday, so I am going through her past work from last year to work out what the best goals would be for her. Speech and speech facilitation will be a big one, as well as computer usage, personal hygiene etc. I am going into this one with very clear thoughts on how we can get the best possible outcome for her and will be pushing up the expectations of the school.
Getting the kids into a better routine of doing homework straight after school...even Brent is catching up. I do believe they are actually starting to get it.
Oh and I asked the boss for the time off I need for Spain...explained what I wanted to do....no dramas there...he thinks its great that I am planning to do something that is on my wishlist in life.
We had a huge conversation in lunch yesterday about the mundane shit that people complain about especially women at the school gate. Michael said something really interesting in that I just don't complain. I see complaining as a totally useless exercise.....it just doesnt help me or the kids. I'm also a very practical person.....change nothing and nothing changes is my motto....if I'm not happy, its really up to me to make the changes necessary. I also don't panic that much.
Anyway, on with my busy day....its going to be huge!
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Work today!
A very busy couple of days at work this week. End of month and staff issues to sort out. The time will go quickly though.
Miracle of Miracles......all my kids did homework last night. Brent even did 3 hours of maths. I am so proud of him!!! I have banned computer use until 5pm for Jack, 7.30 for Brent and 6pm for Melinda. Homework is so difficult for these kids. Brent has it in his head that homework shouldnt exist..and that the teachers should just teach in class time. Sorry pal, you are now year 12...you need to do homework.
Was watching the devastating earthquake in NZ. I think I cried a bucket. Its just so awful. Dear friends lost their Brother in Law. It kindof makes me think though, you need to appreciate today and those around you, because who knows what tomorrow will bring.
Anyway, on with the day....lots to do..oh and Im cleaning up the front garden. Already its looking so much better!
Miracle of Miracles......all my kids did homework last night. Brent even did 3 hours of maths. I am so proud of him!!! I have banned computer use until 5pm for Jack, 7.30 for Brent and 6pm for Melinda. Homework is so difficult for these kids. Brent has it in his head that homework shouldnt exist..and that the teachers should just teach in class time. Sorry pal, you are now year 12...you need to do homework.
Was watching the devastating earthquake in NZ. I think I cried a bucket. Its just so awful. Dear friends lost their Brother in Law. It kindof makes me think though, you need to appreciate today and those around you, because who knows what tomorrow will bring.
Anyway, on with the day....lots to do..oh and Im cleaning up the front garden. Already its looking so much better!
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Vison boards, quitting a job and the way we put ourselves out for our kids!
I am making an awesome vision board! I went to spotlight yesterday..bought some bright green paint, some wooden carved words which I will paint today..I already had a huge canvas, so I have painted the background....Now its to finding pictures of things I envision for myself....I can't wait to have this on my wall to remind myself whats really important in life. Last time I made a vision board.....everything on it came true...yes, not by some miracle, but by reminding myself of what I wanted all the time, I worked towards it.
Yesterday I threw in one of my jobs.....its a relief!! I know I am far more content and organised only working 2 days a week....and it shows in the kids especially when I am stressed. Too, it gives me a lot more time for the truly creative side of my personality. I am one of the strange people who are both left and right brained..analytical and yet creative. I feel at odds with myself when I dont get the chance to indulge the creative side, it almost feels as if something is totally missing in my life.
Today, Melinda went off to school so happy. She paid me the ultimate compliment as a mum.....YOU ARE EPIC! They are having their school swimming sports today...and she was dressing up as Emma out of one of the animes she watches. We went op shopping on Saturday and found a few things, but was missing a vest and a bow. I drew up a pattern last night, and this morning made it out of a shirt we bought from the op-shop. I also made the bow this morning.....just as well I am a morning person as I was up by 4am. Also decorated the muffins that she made last night. She went off happily with her hair done beautifully (for once), dressed up in her costume with her great looking muffins.......a happy girl.
Oh and we sold our old caravan.....someone drove past it yesterday where we store it, went in and offered to buy it. The van is about 45 years old....a bloody heavy huge old thing and was just about stuffed inside. Anyway, the guy who bought it does them up...apparently she was a rare old thing. Steve is very relieved about getting a good price for it, cash in hand.....as we were planning on getting rid of it in the next year or so anyway. It was so heavy to tow. Now looking for something smaller.
Oh and I will have to get on to gtting my passport.....aiming to get to Spain in May with Steve. He is going on a conference, and Spain has always been on my bucket list. Fingers crossed I make it.
Oh and the electrician is coming to hopefully fix our spa today. Oh I miss that thing...I can't wait til its fixed!!
Yesterday I threw in one of my jobs.....its a relief!! I know I am far more content and organised only working 2 days a week....and it shows in the kids especially when I am stressed. Too, it gives me a lot more time for the truly creative side of my personality. I am one of the strange people who are both left and right brained..analytical and yet creative. I feel at odds with myself when I dont get the chance to indulge the creative side, it almost feels as if something is totally missing in my life.
Today, Melinda went off to school so happy. She paid me the ultimate compliment as a mum.....YOU ARE EPIC! They are having their school swimming sports today...and she was dressing up as Emma out of one of the animes she watches. We went op shopping on Saturday and found a few things, but was missing a vest and a bow. I drew up a pattern last night, and this morning made it out of a shirt we bought from the op-shop. I also made the bow this morning.....just as well I am a morning person as I was up by 4am. Also decorated the muffins that she made last night. She went off happily with her hair done beautifully (for once), dressed up in her costume with her great looking muffins.......a happy girl.
Oh and we sold our old caravan.....someone drove past it yesterday where we store it, went in and offered to buy it. The van is about 45 years old....a bloody heavy huge old thing and was just about stuffed inside. Anyway, the guy who bought it does them up...apparently she was a rare old thing. Steve is very relieved about getting a good price for it, cash in hand.....as we were planning on getting rid of it in the next year or so anyway. It was so heavy to tow. Now looking for something smaller.
Oh and I will have to get on to gtting my passport.....aiming to get to Spain in May with Steve. He is going on a conference, and Spain has always been on my bucket list. Fingers crossed I make it.
Oh and the electrician is coming to hopefully fix our spa today. Oh I miss that thing...I can't wait til its fixed!!
Monday, February 21, 2011
Bucket lists, dreams and goals!
I have been drifting along for a while now....I realise its because my goals dreams and bucket lists really arent relevant to what I really want in life right now. Also that Im not feeling particularly creative. I think the biggest cause is the chaos that reigns supreme here. Im reactive rather than proactive. So my first task is to work like crazy around the house to get it into top shape...to a place where I am happy. Hey its not that bad...the floors are pretty clean, just that every other surface has clutter....like the odd socks that accumulate.....oh and there is always yukky washing in the laundry. The next two weeks I am going to chose a hotspot each day and gradually clean them off. The next thing after that is to make a list of the changes I want to make...ie get rid of the furniture that I hate and perhaps look through op shops....maybe I can find new stuff without huge expense.
After spending time at a friends place helping out yesterday...Yes, I did go to the working bee....I realise that sometimes I just have to put myself out for other people....Its good for my soul to do things for others. So....I couldnt ask for help myself, but nor can I begrudge other people for having the guts to do so. I know I can do it for myself because I break tasks down to 15 minute blocks...and gradually they get done. Another thing I realised yesterday is just how hard and effectively I have fought for my kids. We have achieved what others have not, and I fight like mad at every injustice.
Anyway, time for a new week...a pretty busy one...school council meeting tonight, meetings at barwon valley school, work of course will be flat out as its end of month already but most of all, creating a peaceful home for my beautiful husband and kids.
When Steve is away, I just feel the place falls apart...he is always doing little things to keep me up to date..the odd load of washing, clean up of the kitchen, adjudication in kids arguments, computer guru. He really is wonderful! I really appreciate everything that he does and know he helps whenever he can. I definitely made a good choice!~!
After spending time at a friends place helping out yesterday...Yes, I did go to the working bee....I realise that sometimes I just have to put myself out for other people....Its good for my soul to do things for others. So....I couldnt ask for help myself, but nor can I begrudge other people for having the guts to do so. I know I can do it for myself because I break tasks down to 15 minute blocks...and gradually they get done. Another thing I realised yesterday is just how hard and effectively I have fought for my kids. We have achieved what others have not, and I fight like mad at every injustice.
Anyway, time for a new week...a pretty busy one...school council meeting tonight, meetings at barwon valley school, work of course will be flat out as its end of month already but most of all, creating a peaceful home for my beautiful husband and kids.
When Steve is away, I just feel the place falls apart...he is always doing little things to keep me up to date..the odd load of washing, clean up of the kitchen, adjudication in kids arguments, computer guru. He really is wonderful! I really appreciate everything that he does and know he helps whenever he can. I definitely made a good choice!~!
Saturday, February 19, 2011
Legacies from childhood -good and bad
I realised yesterday, one of the huge legacies I had from childhood is my independent streak. I never ask for help...I just can't and even when help is given, I really don't know how to be gracious about accepting it.
My realisation came about when a friend organised a "secret" working bee at her house...for herself. Thinking it was a friend who organised it as she is going through a hard time, I put my hand up. In some ways though, now I have found out that she organised it for herself I changed my mind. I'd have to be half dead and totally helpless to ask for my friends to do that for me. Hey we could all do with a hand occasionally, especially with special needs kids, but to come out and ask for it...no.
I even find it hard to go to the charities for respite care...even though the government gives them the money to provide it....I really need to start changing my thinking. Stef needs all the help she can get!!
My realisation came about when a friend organised a "secret" working bee at her house...for herself. Thinking it was a friend who organised it as she is going through a hard time, I put my hand up. In some ways though, now I have found out that she organised it for herself I changed my mind. I'd have to be half dead and totally helpless to ask for my friends to do that for me. Hey we could all do with a hand occasionally, especially with special needs kids, but to come out and ask for it...no.
I even find it hard to go to the charities for respite care...even though the government gives them the money to provide it....I really need to start changing my thinking. Stef needs all the help she can get!!
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Feeling a bit rushed at the moment!
Life is just so busy right now. Slow down the bus, I feel motion sick. Its always busy in this house....keeping up to 4 kids is pretty busy, but throw in the autism factor and honestly it can get crazy here.
Melinda's school shoes broke.....and do you think I could get a pair her size close by...no, I have to go into town for them. It sucks that the shoes are just fine, except for the stupid buckle.
Of course I always have washing and dishes to do...have a 5 foot high pile to fold and 4 loads to hang out this morning before work..and two loads of dishes to go through the dishwasher......all before 8am.
This evening I have two meetings..both at the same time, both compulsary.....one for Brent on planning and homework for year 12....and the other is for Jack regarding Netbook lease. Might ring up the primary school and arrange an alternative for that one. Its easier as I know the teacher running it, and the school knows me well enough to understand my time pressures.
Work is very busy...time flies so fast, but thats a good thing. Always a lot to do to keep up.
Anyway, on to the next load of washing......I just need to catch up, just a little. I think its a bit tougher when Steve is not home...even just the dishes occasionally is enough to help me keep up. When he is away, its all up to me.
Melinda's school shoes broke.....and do you think I could get a pair her size close by...no, I have to go into town for them. It sucks that the shoes are just fine, except for the stupid buckle.
Of course I always have washing and dishes to do...have a 5 foot high pile to fold and 4 loads to hang out this morning before work..and two loads of dishes to go through the dishwasher......all before 8am.
This evening I have two meetings..both at the same time, both compulsary.....one for Brent on planning and homework for year 12....and the other is for Jack regarding Netbook lease. Might ring up the primary school and arrange an alternative for that one. Its easier as I know the teacher running it, and the school knows me well enough to understand my time pressures.
Work is very busy...time flies so fast, but thats a good thing. Always a lot to do to keep up.
Anyway, on to the next load of washing......I just need to catch up, just a little. I think its a bit tougher when Steve is not home...even just the dishes occasionally is enough to help me keep up. When he is away, its all up to me.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Plans for the day..
Work today! I love it, and look forward to going to work each week. I think I have finally struck a work/life balance that suits us. Two days gives me the social contact, the mind challenge and the money for extras. Any more becomes too stressful to keep up.
Already done 1 load of washing, one load currently washing and kitchen cleaned up. Just waking up the very tired kids. We went swimming after school, which wore them out. Stef always sleeps like a bomb after swimming. She spends the whole time in the deep end, and rarely touches the sides. She treads water so well and floats around.
The chooks had an altercation with the cat over the back fence...lets just say, the chooks won. They all flew at it with claws out. Our cat has given up after being attacked by them....and now just sits in the yard with them.
Today I will take some pictures out of my office window. The view over the valley is just so peaceful.....its something I really appreciate...serenity and peace. It revives my soul.
Anyways, on with the day...time to get everybody moving.
Already done 1 load of washing, one load currently washing and kitchen cleaned up. Just waking up the very tired kids. We went swimming after school, which wore them out. Stef always sleeps like a bomb after swimming. She spends the whole time in the deep end, and rarely touches the sides. She treads water so well and floats around.
The chooks had an altercation with the cat over the back fence...lets just say, the chooks won. They all flew at it with claws out. Our cat has given up after being attacked by them....and now just sits in the yard with them.
Today I will take some pictures out of my office window. The view over the valley is just so peaceful.....its something I really appreciate...serenity and peace. It revives my soul.
Anyways, on with the day...time to get everybody moving.
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Getting there!
Gradually getting the house under control again, room by room. Its hard to catch up after holidays in this place. I always have a lot of washing. Probably 4 times more than an average sort of family, so when we throw in a huge pile after being on holidays...it tips the balance over. It takes a fair bit to catch up.
Had to visit my mum yesterday...she thought that the weeds that have come up mysteriously in her garden was marjuana.....it wasnt. But it was good to catch up with my mum. I am going to try to get to see her at least once a week. Its one of my new years resolutions, to spend more time with my mum. She turned 79 last week....time is ticking and who knows what the future brings. The last thing I want is to regret not spending the time with her now. She is very fit and quite healthy, very active and very with it.
Steve is in China and I didnt hear from him yesterday except for one SMS...must be busy!
The kids are ok. Brent is being the usual teenage pain in the ass...won't go to bed, then won't get up in the morning...arguing about doing homework etc etc...not sure why he thinks that everything changes when dad isnt around and that he rules the roost.
Anyways, time to get moving...designed some clothes yesterday...now to draw up the patterns.
Had to visit my mum yesterday...she thought that the weeds that have come up mysteriously in her garden was marjuana.....it wasnt. But it was good to catch up with my mum. I am going to try to get to see her at least once a week. Its one of my new years resolutions, to spend more time with my mum. She turned 79 last week....time is ticking and who knows what the future brings. The last thing I want is to regret not spending the time with her now. She is very fit and quite healthy, very active and very with it.
Steve is in China and I didnt hear from him yesterday except for one SMS...must be busy!
The kids are ok. Brent is being the usual teenage pain in the ass...won't go to bed, then won't get up in the morning...arguing about doing homework etc etc...not sure why he thinks that everything changes when dad isnt around and that he rules the roost.
Anyways, time to get moving...designed some clothes yesterday...now to draw up the patterns.
Monday, February 14, 2011
St Kilda Festival-out and about
We had a huge throw out of things on Saturday....2 garbage bins full from Stefs room. We threw out most of her baby toys, lots and lots of broken books and just crap from her room. It was so gross. Felt good though to finally have her room a little organised. Tomorrow I will go to the opshop and see if I can pick up a tv stand for her tv and dvd player.
Saturday night, we had respite care. We went out to Acland Street in St kilda and had a really nice meal. Melbourne really has so many great places to go to, lots of atmosphere and great food. Lots of talking which was wonderful and then went to the Esplanade hotel to catch some music. Its so nice to spend time together as a couple. We are the glue that keeps this family just ticking along and with all our troubles, the glue sometimes gets a bit stretched. Taking time out together makes the glue like concrete. Everything just seems so much easier when our relationship is right. We got home at 1am, and Steve was up at 5am to go to China. I was so hoping that he wasnt going, he really was so sick. The doctor gave him the ok on Friday to fly, so off he went. Doesnt stop me worrying about him though.
Yesterday I took the youngest three and Ronan (Jacks friend) to the St Kilda festival. We caught the train up from Lara, and then tram to St Kilda. It really amazes me how well Stef copes with public transport now. She gets on and off them like she has been doing it forever. I guess though she has been doing it forever or at least as long as she has been able to walk. All the journeys we have taken over the years has trained her. The crowds at the festival were huge.....lots of people, lots of noise and she coped with it all. The kids had a great time on jumping castles, slides and bungee trampolines. Stef was keen to have a go on a few things, but baulked once the reality set in. She wanted to go on this blow up shark slide....I finally convinced the guy to allow her to have a go, she got right to the steps, but then because the stair case was covered in, just couldnt quite overcome her fears. Poor kid, if only I could take those fears away. Then, she wanted a go at the bungee trampoline...alas, same thing happened. The guy there was so patient and kind with her.....we tried so hard to get her relaxed, but again, when he went to put the bungee cords on to her harness (we actually got the harness on), she just freaked. Pity....I think she would have loved it. Thems the breaks...maybe next time we will get that one step further. We still have to try though and keep on trying. Had I given up on her when we used to go to the pool, and she used to freak out, she never ever would have been able to swim. Now she swims like a fish...and its one thing she loves to do. We just have to keep trying.
Well, its Monday morning....lots to do. Washing, cleaning up, and then Im going to sit down and design this afternoon. I am going to make Stef some clothes, and some heat bags. I'm also going to work on some UFO's.unfinished business thats hanging over my head.
Saturday night, we had respite care. We went out to Acland Street in St kilda and had a really nice meal. Melbourne really has so many great places to go to, lots of atmosphere and great food. Lots of talking which was wonderful and then went to the Esplanade hotel to catch some music. Its so nice to spend time together as a couple. We are the glue that keeps this family just ticking along and with all our troubles, the glue sometimes gets a bit stretched. Taking time out together makes the glue like concrete. Everything just seems so much easier when our relationship is right. We got home at 1am, and Steve was up at 5am to go to China. I was so hoping that he wasnt going, he really was so sick. The doctor gave him the ok on Friday to fly, so off he went. Doesnt stop me worrying about him though.
Yesterday I took the youngest three and Ronan (Jacks friend) to the St Kilda festival. We caught the train up from Lara, and then tram to St Kilda. It really amazes me how well Stef copes with public transport now. She gets on and off them like she has been doing it forever. I guess though she has been doing it forever or at least as long as she has been able to walk. All the journeys we have taken over the years has trained her. The crowds at the festival were huge.....lots of people, lots of noise and she coped with it all. The kids had a great time on jumping castles, slides and bungee trampolines. Stef was keen to have a go on a few things, but baulked once the reality set in. She wanted to go on this blow up shark slide....I finally convinced the guy to allow her to have a go, she got right to the steps, but then because the stair case was covered in, just couldnt quite overcome her fears. Poor kid, if only I could take those fears away. Then, she wanted a go at the bungee trampoline...alas, same thing happened. The guy there was so patient and kind with her.....we tried so hard to get her relaxed, but again, when he went to put the bungee cords on to her harness (we actually got the harness on), she just freaked. Pity....I think she would have loved it. Thems the breaks...maybe next time we will get that one step further. We still have to try though and keep on trying. Had I given up on her when we used to go to the pool, and she used to freak out, she never ever would have been able to swim. Now she swims like a fish...and its one thing she loves to do. We just have to keep trying.
Well, its Monday morning....lots to do. Washing, cleaning up, and then Im going to sit down and design this afternoon. I am going to make Stef some clothes, and some heat bags. I'm also going to work on some UFO's.unfinished business thats hanging over my head.
Friday, February 11, 2011
Throwing out time!
We have a mini skip arriving this morning...time for a damned good clean up and throw out!~So many big things to throw out that a trailer just wouldnt do it.
Steve is improving healthwise. Asthma really just sucks. I think it frightens me a bit more than it used to. After having a cold, and asthma and going downhill to the point of respiratory shutdown with in a couple of hours a few years ago scared me so much. Definitely giving up smoking again very soon.
Went to the funeral yesterday...very sad. It seems so unfair that she was such a beautiful girl...a good christian woman..never swore, rarely drank, never smoked...and yet she was taken when so many bastards remain alive. It just doesnt seem right somehow. It was the longest service I have ever been to...an hour and a half! So many spoke for her...her husband Tony and her daughter Jaqui, did amazing jobs..really amazing. She was just an amzing woman who never had a bad word about anyone.
Work was great. It was a difficult pay day, lots of changes and with the interuptions I was struggling a bit....but it got done. Thanks to Stevo for stepping in to help with the kids even though you were sick. You are awesome!
Anyway, on with getting some housework done before I have to get the kids up. Lots to do today.
Steve is improving healthwise. Asthma really just sucks. I think it frightens me a bit more than it used to. After having a cold, and asthma and going downhill to the point of respiratory shutdown with in a couple of hours a few years ago scared me so much. Definitely giving up smoking again very soon.
Went to the funeral yesterday...very sad. It seems so unfair that she was such a beautiful girl...a good christian woman..never swore, rarely drank, never smoked...and yet she was taken when so many bastards remain alive. It just doesnt seem right somehow. It was the longest service I have ever been to...an hour and a half! So many spoke for her...her husband Tony and her daughter Jaqui, did amazing jobs..really amazing. She was just an amzing woman who never had a bad word about anyone.
Work was great. It was a difficult pay day, lots of changes and with the interuptions I was struggling a bit....but it got done. Thanks to Stevo for stepping in to help with the kids even though you were sick. You are awesome!
Anyway, on with getting some housework done before I have to get the kids up. Lots to do today.
Thursday, February 10, 2011
A good boss!
It's amazing what a difference having a good boss makes. Yesterday I asked for time off today to go to the funeral of my friend..boss said, no worries, do what you need to do. Yes I know that I would never leave my job undone, that I would make up for it to get it done (like going in until 6pm last night), but its nice that they know that I will get it done regardless. Makes such a difference.
It was such a busy day at work yesterday..flat out and time just seemed to fly. I will go in early today as well so that I can get the pays pretty much done before I leave at 10.30.
I hate funerals, but I feel I need to go. When Jack asked why I would go to it, I said to let the family know that we care, to pay respects to the beautiful woman she was and to say goodbye. I think he gets it. He has more empathy than most kids with autism, certainly a lot more than Brent has. I still think he is far more ADHD than aspergers.
Steve is still sick with Asthma....he is supposed to be flying out to China on Monday, but really I don't think he is going to make it. It would be really unwise to travel the way he is. I guess a doctors visit on Friday will either say yes or no, but I wouldnt.
Kids are all settling into school well. Brent is working for once...woohoo. He gets it, he really gets it. Jack is happy with his teacher. Miss Olsten is a lovely lady who taught Stef last year. She gets the whole disability bit. Also having known her, it makes communication very easy and free. I think that is the true key...having enough of a relationship with teachers and aides to really have an easy conversation. It also means they will come to you quickly if there are problems. It makes a huge difference.
I've got so much to do at the moment, but you know, I am getting better at doing whats important first. The prioritisation of things has always been an issue for me, and then the following through. I really think I am improving in this.
Oh and I'm getting my bucketlist together....the things I really want to do. I really want to get to spain..Steve is going in May for work....maybe if I save heaps between now and then I may get there too....if not, I will save so we can both go.
Anyways, off to doing some washing and dishes before work.
It was such a busy day at work yesterday..flat out and time just seemed to fly. I will go in early today as well so that I can get the pays pretty much done before I leave at 10.30.
I hate funerals, but I feel I need to go. When Jack asked why I would go to it, I said to let the family know that we care, to pay respects to the beautiful woman she was and to say goodbye. I think he gets it. He has more empathy than most kids with autism, certainly a lot more than Brent has. I still think he is far more ADHD than aspergers.
Steve is still sick with Asthma....he is supposed to be flying out to China on Monday, but really I don't think he is going to make it. It would be really unwise to travel the way he is. I guess a doctors visit on Friday will either say yes or no, but I wouldnt.
Kids are all settling into school well. Brent is working for once...woohoo. He gets it, he really gets it. Jack is happy with his teacher. Miss Olsten is a lovely lady who taught Stef last year. She gets the whole disability bit. Also having known her, it makes communication very easy and free. I think that is the true key...having enough of a relationship with teachers and aides to really have an easy conversation. It also means they will come to you quickly if there are problems. It makes a huge difference.
I've got so much to do at the moment, but you know, I am getting better at doing whats important first. The prioritisation of things has always been an issue for me, and then the following through. I really think I am improving in this.
Oh and I'm getting my bucketlist together....the things I really want to do. I really want to get to spain..Steve is going in May for work....maybe if I save heaps between now and then I may get there too....if not, I will save so we can both go.
Anyways, off to doing some washing and dishes before work.
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Contemplation!
I lost a dear friend on Friday. A huge battle with breast cancer. Its sad, she leaves behind 3 beautiful girls and a devastated husband. She was always someone who was concerened about others. Always asked on the infrequent catch ups we had how I was coping and what was happening in my life. Anyway, the last catch up we had was a quick coffee when we ran into each other in November. Obviously she was struggling to breathe, but she brushed that aside. The thing that struck me most about our last conversation is that she said that for the first time, I actually accepted my lot in life and that I was making the most of the cards that I have been given. Alos was the realisation that I am not the one living with the disability, that is not my journey. My journey is to help them be the best that they can be..the rest of the journey is theirs to take.
On contemplation of this last conversation this week..I had the realisation that i really need to live my life...yes, I will be always looking at the differences between my life and those with "normal" kids, but ultimately I need to live my life not just struggle on and live for caring for my kids. Who knows how much time we have left...nothing is ever guaranteed hey, so I need to live with more intention. Doing the things that are important for me as well as deal with the issues that come my way. So now to find the things that are important for me....whats my bucketlist...what are my true goals and dreams. I know what my dreams for my kids are, but what are mine.
On contemplation of this last conversation this week..I had the realisation that i really need to live my life...yes, I will be always looking at the differences between my life and those with "normal" kids, but ultimately I need to live my life not just struggle on and live for caring for my kids. Who knows how much time we have left...nothing is ever guaranteed hey, so I need to live with more intention. Doing the things that are important for me as well as deal with the issues that come my way. So now to find the things that are important for me....whats my bucketlist...what are my true goals and dreams. I know what my dreams for my kids are, but what are mine.
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
So far so good!
Had an email from Brent's aide yesterday. So far Brent seems pretty committed to doing well this year. I think its so important for the school to remain in contact with me about Brent. I have asked his aide to make sure all his teachers have my email address and to contact me with any concerns at any time. I have also asked for any due dates for assignments to be given to me so that I can make sure Brent gets them done.
Melinda had a good first day. Hopefully she will get more organised this year. She is so much like me...very disorganised mentally. I'm trying to give her the tools to get more organised that I use, but she won't listen. Like any teenager, she thinks she knows everything and that parents are idiots.
Stef went off happily again this morning. Her teacher is very impressed by her ability to follow instructions and her compliance. Its something that we have been working on so Im pretty pleased.
Jack....well, he's just Jack. I think it will be difficult to keep him at school...he is just not academic. He's smart enough, just his attention span is short, and his writing ability holds him back enormously. He is around 2 years behind his peers.
Well, as for me....I'm working 2 days a week. I just love it. I have come to the conclusion that two or even 3 days a week is enough for me to cope with. Its all the extra little things like having to get books for Brent yesterday, making sure I catch up to mum on a regular basis (after all, she is getting on a bit...79th birthday was on Sunday) and have a bit of time to me. Housework and washing is always a huge issue in this house. Our dishwasher runs at least twice a day, the washing machine 4-5 loads a day let alone all the other cleaning up. My kids are messy little pigs.
We lost our darling old dog on Australia day....it was very sad. Now I'm on the hunt for a new golden retriever pup. It will be lovely to have a new puppy in the house...I love watching the bonding process between the kids and the dog. It really is something special. Now its just to find the right temprement pup and then its the whole training process.
Our beautiful chickens are doing great. They really are very friendly little things and their eggs are just great. Nothing like fresh eggs from happy chooks. I also have to do a fair bit of gardening in the next months. Vegetable prices are going through the roof!~
So much to do, always on a limited time budget, but hey...I'd hate to be bored.
Melinda had a good first day. Hopefully she will get more organised this year. She is so much like me...very disorganised mentally. I'm trying to give her the tools to get more organised that I use, but she won't listen. Like any teenager, she thinks she knows everything and that parents are idiots.
Stef went off happily again this morning. Her teacher is very impressed by her ability to follow instructions and her compliance. Its something that we have been working on so Im pretty pleased.
Jack....well, he's just Jack. I think it will be difficult to keep him at school...he is just not academic. He's smart enough, just his attention span is short, and his writing ability holds him back enormously. He is around 2 years behind his peers.
Well, as for me....I'm working 2 days a week. I just love it. I have come to the conclusion that two or even 3 days a week is enough for me to cope with. Its all the extra little things like having to get books for Brent yesterday, making sure I catch up to mum on a regular basis (after all, she is getting on a bit...79th birthday was on Sunday) and have a bit of time to me. Housework and washing is always a huge issue in this house. Our dishwasher runs at least twice a day, the washing machine 4-5 loads a day let alone all the other cleaning up. My kids are messy little pigs.
We lost our darling old dog on Australia day....it was very sad. Now I'm on the hunt for a new golden retriever pup. It will be lovely to have a new puppy in the house...I love watching the bonding process between the kids and the dog. It really is something special. Now its just to find the right temprement pup and then its the whole training process.
Our beautiful chickens are doing great. They really are very friendly little things and their eggs are just great. Nothing like fresh eggs from happy chooks. I also have to do a fair bit of gardening in the next months. Vegetable prices are going through the roof!~
So much to do, always on a limited time budget, but hey...I'd hate to be bored.
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